Re: Light Bulbs
Them ain't lightbulbs your trying to change -- They ar "Dark Suckers" and they are full of DARK!! Doncha see the dark streaks and hear it rattle.<br /><br /> The Dark Sucker Theory<br /><br /> For years, it has been believed that electric bulbs emit light,<br />but recent information has proved otherwise. Electric bulbs don't<br />emit light; they suck dark. Thus, we call these bulbs Dark Suckers.<br /> The Dark Sucker Theory and the existence of dark suckers prove<br />that dark has mass and is heavier than light.<br /> First, the basis of the Dark Sucker Theory is that electric bulbs<br />suck dark. For example, take the Dark Sucker in the room you are in.<br />There is much less dark right next to it than there is elsewhere. The<br />larger the Dark Sucker, the greater its capacity to suck dark.<br />Dark Suckers in the parking lot have a much greater capacity to suck<br />dark than the ones in this room.<br /> So with all things, Dark Suckers don't last forever. Once they are<br />full of dark, they can no longer suck. This is proven by the dark spot<br />on a full Dark Sucker.<br /> A candle is a primitive Dark Sucker. A new candle has a white wick.<br />You can see that after the first use, the wick turns black, representing<br />all the dark that has been sucked into it. If you put a pencil next to<br />the wick of an operating candle, it will turn black. This is because<br />it got in the way of the dark flowing into the candle. One of the<br />disadvantages of these primitive Dark Suckers is their limited range.<br /> There are also portable Dark Suckers. In these, the bulbs can't<br />handle all the dark by themselves and must be aided by a Dark Storage<br />Unit. When the Dark Storage Unit is full, it must be either emptied<br />or replaced before the portable Dark Sucker can operate again.<br /> Dark has mass. When dark goes into a Dark Sucker, friction from<br />the mass generates heat. Thus, it is not wise to touch an operating<br />Dark Sucker. Candles present a special problem as the mass must travel<br />into a solid wick instead of through clear glass. This generates a<br />great amount of heat and therefore it's not wise to touch an operating<br />candle.<br /> Also, dark is heavier than light. If you were to swim just below<br />the surface of the lake, you would see a lot of light. If you were to<br />slowly swim deeper and deeper, you would notice it getting darker and<br />darker. When you get really deep, you would be in total darkness. This<br />is because the heavier dark sinks to the bottom of the lake and the<br />lighter light floats at the top. The is why it is called light.<br /> Finally, we must prove that dark is faster than light. If you were<br />to stand in a lit room in front of a closed, dark closet, and slowly<br />opened the closet door, you would see the light slowly enter the closet.<br />But since dark is so fast, you would not be able to see the dark leave<br />the closet.<br /> Next time you see an electric bulb, remember that it is a Dark Sucker.<br /><br />For more info on this revolutionary idea, see this link.<br />EDIT update link<br /><br /> http://home.netcom.com/~rogermw/darksucker.html <br /><br />JD
Them ain't lightbulbs your trying to change -- They ar "Dark Suckers" and they are full of DARK!! Doncha see the dark streaks and hear it rattle.<br /><br /> The Dark Sucker Theory<br /><br /> For years, it has been believed that electric bulbs emit light,<br />but recent information has proved otherwise. Electric bulbs don't<br />emit light; they suck dark. Thus, we call these bulbs Dark Suckers.<br /> The Dark Sucker Theory and the existence of dark suckers prove<br />that dark has mass and is heavier than light.<br /> First, the basis of the Dark Sucker Theory is that electric bulbs<br />suck dark. For example, take the Dark Sucker in the room you are in.<br />There is much less dark right next to it than there is elsewhere. The<br />larger the Dark Sucker, the greater its capacity to suck dark.<br />Dark Suckers in the parking lot have a much greater capacity to suck<br />dark than the ones in this room.<br /> So with all things, Dark Suckers don't last forever. Once they are<br />full of dark, they can no longer suck. This is proven by the dark spot<br />on a full Dark Sucker.<br /> A candle is a primitive Dark Sucker. A new candle has a white wick.<br />You can see that after the first use, the wick turns black, representing<br />all the dark that has been sucked into it. If you put a pencil next to<br />the wick of an operating candle, it will turn black. This is because<br />it got in the way of the dark flowing into the candle. One of the<br />disadvantages of these primitive Dark Suckers is their limited range.<br /> There are also portable Dark Suckers. In these, the bulbs can't<br />handle all the dark by themselves and must be aided by a Dark Storage<br />Unit. When the Dark Storage Unit is full, it must be either emptied<br />or replaced before the portable Dark Sucker can operate again.<br /> Dark has mass. When dark goes into a Dark Sucker, friction from<br />the mass generates heat. Thus, it is not wise to touch an operating<br />Dark Sucker. Candles present a special problem as the mass must travel<br />into a solid wick instead of through clear glass. This generates a<br />great amount of heat and therefore it's not wise to touch an operating<br />candle.<br /> Also, dark is heavier than light. If you were to swim just below<br />the surface of the lake, you would see a lot of light. If you were to<br />slowly swim deeper and deeper, you would notice it getting darker and<br />darker. When you get really deep, you would be in total darkness. This<br />is because the heavier dark sinks to the bottom of the lake and the<br />lighter light floats at the top. The is why it is called light.<br /> Finally, we must prove that dark is faster than light. If you were<br />to stand in a lit room in front of a closed, dark closet, and slowly<br />opened the closet door, you would see the light slowly enter the closet.<br />But since dark is so fast, you would not be able to see the dark leave<br />the closet.<br /> Next time you see an electric bulb, remember that it is a Dark Sucker.<br /><br />For more info on this revolutionary idea, see this link.<br />EDIT update link<br /><br /> http://home.netcom.com/~rogermw/darksucker.html <br /><br />JD
