One liners

[Dave Abrahamson]

Re: One liners

Not a one

 

[scrapper]

Re: One liners

How do you keep fish from smelling? .... ( Cut off their noses)

 

[Reel Poor]

Re: One liners

What do you call a deer with no eyes?? no ideer

 

[txswinner]

Re: One liners

When you get to the fork in the road, take it. Yogi Berra

 

[technostingray]

Re: One liners

When you come to a fork in the road, don't run over it. It might get stuck in your tire.

 

[TwoBallScrewBall]

Re: One liners

A pirate walks in to a bar. Bartender says "Hey you know you got a steering wheel in your pants?" Pirate says:<br /><br />"Arrrrrrrrrrrr, it's drivin' me nuts!"

 

[Dave Abrahamson]

Re: One liners

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

 

[Dave Abrahamson]

Re: One liners

There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count & those who can't

 

[Dave Abrahamson]

Re: One liners

Borrow money from a pessimist, they don't expect it back

 

[KilroyJC]

Re: One liners

There are 10 types of people in the world:<br /><br />Those who understand binary and those who don't.

 

[KilroyJC]

Re: One liners

POOR SPELLERS OF THE WORLD - UNTIE!

 

[dolluper]

Re: One liners

If I wanted to hear from a A hole I would fart

 

[technostingray]

Re: One liners

Originally posted by dolluper:<br /> If I wanted to hear from a A hole I would fart

Takes one to know one. He who smelt it dealt it.

 

[txswinner]

Re: One liners

(The snake) "What do you expect, I am a snake."<br /><br />(The Shark) "Come on in the water is fine."<br /><br />(The Wife) "Purple."<br /><br />(The Wife) "You through yet."<br /><br />(Me to the wife) "You spent what."<br /><br />(My childrens favorite from me) "Don't make me stop this car."<br /><br />Merry Christmas Everyone

 

[OBJ]

Re: One liners

Eat healthy, exercise, stay fit.......die anyways.<br /><br />You know your old when sex becomes a four letter word.........HELP!

 

[Wotknot]

Re: One liners

5/4ths of the world's population don't know their fractions.<br /><br /><br />My wife's purse, filled full of credit cards, was stolen while she was in the mall. I was going to report it, but the thief's spending less than she did.

 

[technostingray]

Re: One liners

The more things change, the more they stay the same.

 

[JamesCoste]

Re: One liners

Practice doesn't make perfect, it makes permanent.

 

[txswinner]

Re: One liners

Wotknot, I did not give you permission to use my baby picture.

 

[technostingray]

Re: One liners

Originally posted by JamesCoste:<br /> Practice doesn't make perfect, it makes permanent.

Almost, Practice doesn't make perfect. Perfect practice makes perfect. As to permanancy, It almost sounds like a threat. <br />(EDIT) John 3:16