Funny Ramp Stories/ Boat Ramp Watching

[infideltarget]

Re: Funny Ramp Stories/ Boat Ramp Watching

Everyone patting me on the back and telling me how impressed they were with me was pretty powerful for me as a young teenager, I also remember that was the day I found out how a beer tastes much better when you have worked for it and people you respect are giving you so much praise.

Sooooooo......promoting underage drinking are we?

 

[sasto]

Re: Funny Ramp Stories/ Boat Ramp Watching

Last week a very good friend of mine, not much of a boater himself, the wife gets seasick, bought his 14 year old son a 17 Wellcraft CC. The boy had been on the water since he was a kid with friends. Grew up on the beach and river. He knows no fear yet. I helped my buddy prep the boat...we loaded up.....and was going on our first ride together. The 3 of us. We launched the boat. The boy fired her up and was gone before we knew what was happening. This is the ICW! Big boats, fast boats, little boats, jet fleas, islands, sandbars, boats on alcohol.... Almost 2 hours later.... he shows back up at the ramp.

Dad was more proud of him than mad.
Way to go Travis!

 

[LippCJ7]

Re: Funny Ramp Stories/ Boat Ramp Watching

Sooooooo......promoting underage drinking are we?

I make no bones about my letting my children have a beer(from 15 or 16 years old) at the lake, I was brought up that way and I am far from an alcoholic!! Binge drinker maybe but not an alcoholic!!

 

[infideltarget]

Re: Funny Ramp Stories/ Boat Ramp Watching

hehe....

 

[jigngrub]

Re: Funny Ramp Stories/ Boat Ramp Watching

I love to watch the antics of the boat launch Bozo's!!! The "newbs", the "once a year" launchers (launch their boat in the spring to take it to the lake house and then pull it out in the fall), and the ones with ill suited tow vehicles that have to smoke the one drive tire to pull up the ramp after loading.

I used to be impatient back in my younger days, but not anymore. If the launch is crowded I'll park and wait for everyone to either launch or load before me... it's a better sitcom than anything on TV.

I will not allow anyone to help me launch unless they're a fellow boat owner and I've seen them launch their own boat... sometimes not even then. All nonboaters will be directed to go stand on the dock and wait (we don't have the luxury of sand beaches to park our boats on).

I've made the same rookie mistakes as everyone else has and will offer help to people that look like they need it. I will also give the appropriate glare to the inconsiderates that are rude and do things on the ramp they should've done in the prelaunch area.

Having said all that... there was this one time...

It was a fairly cold morning in January 3 or 4 years ago that I decided to go Crappie fishing. No one at the ramp or in the parking lot when I arrived, typical for that time of year.

I launch by backing the trailer into the water until the boat just starts to float, then put er in park and apply the emergency brake, get out, one foot on the back truck tire, hop in the bed, out onto the trailer tongue, take off the winch strap and safety cable, give a push and hop onto the bow, the maneuver to the dock with the trolling motor... takes about a minute.

... but on this one morning, the pocket of my jacket somehow snags and hangs on the trolling motor skeg in mid hop... and there I am, laying on the bow from the waist up with legs dangling off. Can't hardly move, I'm STUCK!!! My mind starts racing, how in the heck am I going to get out of this??? Dropping off the bow into 40* water was not an option and there wasn't anyone around to help... and my truck is idling on the launch ramp! I thought about cutting myself free with my pocket knife but couldn't reach it. Then I decided to see if I could somehow take my jacket off while still hanging on with one hand and laying on the front side of the jacket. After what seemed like an hour, but was only a minute or two I got the jacket unzipped, now to get my free arm out of it!!! After wriggling around like some huge demented insect trying to free itself from it's cocoon I get my arm out of the sleeve, this gave me enough slack that I could pull myself up onto the bow while letting the jacket slide down the other arm that was holding on for dear life.

I'm not sure how long all this took, but it seemed a lot longer than real time. I was kinda relieved that no one was around to see me look so foolish... but kinda creeped out that there was also no one around to help.

Now I don't wear any loose clothing when launching the boat.:redface:

 

[Nantucket Bay Scalloper]

Re: Funny Ramp Stories/ Boat Ramp Watching

your 100% right about people have no Idea how fast stuff can turn on them when dealing with boats. It doesn't take long before you find yourself in a situation you cant get out of alone. I always keep a pair of neopreme waders in my cabin, just incase I get hung up in the shallows and need to either pull the boat out or walk to land. I also keep a warm blanket and change of clothes, incase I take a an unexpected dip in the icy water.

Just the other day I fellow fisherman with 40+ year experiance got hung up on a sand bar and spent nearly 4 hours on it waiting for high tide. It just goes to show it can happen to anyone, experianced or not.

Knowing what to do in those situations is so important.

Nantucket, your close call is a good lesson in a way lots of small boats are swamped out on the salt marsh were I go.

On a windy day, a boater hits a shallow spot (the large bays are notorious for being mud flats) and pulls up the motor, blowing further across the shallow water until stuck. It's too windy to shove back out (if they have a shove pole) and the bottom too soft to walk. Even if you make it to deeper water, once you stop shoving, you blow right back. being shallow, the water is choppy, and the waves splash over the transom at the motor. The boat eventually swamps.

The boater could easily die from exposure--it happens in the winter, to duck hunters and naturalists. Due to the shallow water, people are seldom in boats over 18' and they are flat bottomed outboards. The ones that experience this in the summer survive so no telling how often it happens; it doesn't make the papers.

It happened to my father once when we were running several small boats out there. My cousin, in my dad's boat, was unable mentally and physically to help. I could only stand by in the deeper water and watch him struggle to get off the flat, but he made it. I go by that flat all the time and even after almost 40 years picture it clearly.

This is basically a wilderness area--few boaters, few patrols. Back in the day, there were no cell phones and few people had VHF on small boats. Although Coast Guard is around, it's a long run and they are constrained at low tide--and in the dark they won't find you.

Sounds like you saw what was happening and dealt with it. So many people think boats are like cars and ahve no idea how fast things can turn, and how a small event ends up with huge consequences.

 

[bobinphx]

Re: Funny Ramp Stories/ Boat Ramp Watching

ok.. I cant help it, so here goes. Greg if your out there somewhere I seriously hope you are still laughing about this one..

so my best buddy, my best GF, his GF and I decide to go for a day on the lake. We load up my buddies trihull, steal a battery from his brothers car (without telling him), gas up the 1977 ford window van and head for the lake. We get there agree that I will back the boat off the trailer, buddy boy will park the trailer and the GF's both head for the bathrooms. The plan is to meet up at the dock, once everyone is ready..
So my buddy gives me the how to start the boat... Take the screwdriver from the glove box and jam it in the key slot. Turn it to the right,, once its running, pull the screwdriver and put it back in the glove box.. Simple. So we back down the ramp, he gives me a push off the trailer and he drives away. I start to crank the motor and no joy...... so I think... hmmmm must be that bulb thing... we didnt do that.. I turn and head to the back of the boat and find that I have about 3 inches of water in the boat and its rising fast!!!!!!!! I mash the bulb and try to start the motor... again no joy... at this point, me and the boat have floated almost out to the end of the no wake zone.. The water is a good 10 inches deep in the rear of the boat and the bow is way up in the air. I then figure out that we didnt put in the plugs. Will I start to splash around in the boat looking for the plug... its not inside the boat, so it must be outside,,,right??? well I jump in the lake and start feeling for the plugs... cant find them.. but I did find both drain holes... HHMMMMM what to do????? I stick my fingers in the holes and started to try and kick the boat back to shore...You should have seen me.. The holes were on either side of the motor.. Good thing I got a big wing span!! so after about 20 mins of kicking, my buddy swims up and I tell him he forgot the plugs... so he says the plugs are in the glove box. He jumps in the boat and guess what!! NO PLUGS. so then he says they are in the VAN!!!!! off he swims to get the plugs... The girls swim out and one starts to bail and the other helps me kick to shore. We beach, get the plugs in and get the motor started.. My buddy stays that once we are moving, we can take the plugs out and the boat will drain.. LOL.. took about 2 hours to drain that boat and it was way slow in the water at first!!!!! we finally got it all together and had a great rest of the day.. we loaded at the end of the day and headed for home. about 20 min on the freeway and clunk, the boat fell off the van, at 55mph.. I opened the rear van doors and grabbed the bow...and guided the tonge under the bumper and we hit the brakes slow... It was the last time we took that boat out!!!!!!!!! So remember kids, dont boat and drink, dont drive and drink ... and finally dont let your GF get drunk too!!!!!! but thats another story!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Sparke]

Re: Funny Ramp Stories/ Boat Ramp Watching

We use to enjoy weekends at the Mist Resturaunt here in Mound. The nice thing was we sat accross the street on the patio overlookng a very busy ramp. It was hours of great intertainment. One of the best stories was when this guy shows up pulling what I would guess to be a 25' Vhull with a (no lie) Kcar station wagon. Now how he ever got it that far was beyond all of us. So this guy decides he is going to back his little car/big boat down the ramp. As soon as this guy hits the incline things begin to go terribly wrong, that big boat just took his little Kcar down that ramp so fast it was amazing. We could hear his tires screaching all the way accross the street. Let me just say that his boat was definetly far enough in the water to launch, and half his car. It took another guy with a chain and truck to pull the kcar and trailer back up the ramp.
You just cant cure stupid. We ALL stood up and gave him a standing O.

 

[Ozdog]

Re: Funny Ramp Stories/ Boat Ramp Watching

I have a bunch! This one is kind of sad
Dempsey acess Marblehead OH:
Saw a guy in a spotless Wellcraft W/ roller trailer pull up the ramp SNAP goes the rotted winch strap and Blam! goes the outdrive & transom onto the ramp abot 20' or so from the water. Now I'm waiting on a space to drop off my first mate to get the truck all 4 lanes were packed with people. This guy had four people on & they were drunk as heck two gals & two guys. They tried to lift the boat no luck, tried to use a ski rope but to no availe. Nobody would help these people nor from what I could see did he try to round up some guys & lift it back on. The dude gets pissed, jumps in the truck, slams it in reverse and grinds that boat back down to the water.
man I got to tell you, it made me sick to watch. The boat was splintering up , the ramp has drainage cuts every foot or so so it was really doing a number. The last I saw before it hit the water was the glass was gone up to the drain plug. The guy jumps out hooks on the safety chain & pulls out.
The safety chain that was not hooked up would have prevented the entire thing.

 

[Stachi]

Re: Funny Ramp Stories/ Boat Ramp Watching

ok.. I cant help it, so here goes. Greg if your out there somewhere I seriously hope you are still laughing about this one..

so my best buddy, my best GF, his GF and I decide to go for a day on the lake. We load up my buddies trihull, steal a battery from his brothers car (without telling him), gas up the 1977 ford window van and head for the lake. We get there agree that I will back the boat off the trailer, buddy boy will park the trailer and the GF's both head for the bathrooms. The plan is to meet up at the dock, once everyone is ready..
So my buddy gives me the how to start the boat... Take the screwdriver from the glove box and jam it in the key slot. Turn it to the right,, once its running, pull the screwdriver and put it back in the glove box.. Simple. So we back down the ramp, he gives me a push off the trailer and he drives away. I start to crank the motor and no joy...... so I think... hmmmm must be that bulb thing... we didnt do that.. I turn and head to the back of the boat and find that I have about 3 inches of water in the boat and its rising fast!!!!!!!! I mash the bulb and try to start the motor... again no joy... at this point, me and the boat have floated almost out to the end of the no wake zone.. The water is a good 10 inches deep in the rear of the boat and the bow is way up in the air. I then figure out that we didnt put in the plugs. Will I start to splash around in the boat looking for the plug... its not inside the boat, so it must be outside,,,right??? well I jump in the lake and start feeling for the plugs... cant find them.. but I did find both drain holes... HHMMMMM what to do????? I stick my fingers in the holes and started to try and kick the boat back to shore...You should have seen me.. The holes were on either side of the motor.. Good thing I got a big wing span!! so after about 20 mins of kicking, my buddy swims up and I tell him he forgot the plugs... so he says the plugs are in the glove box. He jumps in the boat and guess what!! NO PLUGS. so then he says they are in the VAN!!!!! off he swims to get the plugs... The girls swim out and one starts to bail and the other helps me kick to shore. We beach, get the plugs in and get the motor started.. My buddy stays that once we are moving, we can take the plugs out and the boat will drain.. LOL.. took about 2 hours to drain that boat and it was way slow in the water at first!!!!! we finally got it all together and had a great rest of the day.. we loaded at the end of the day and headed for home. about 20 min on the freeway and clunk, the boat fell off the van, at 55mph.. I opened the rear van doors and grabbed the bow...and guided the tonge under the bumper and we hit the brakes slow... It was the last time we took that boat out!!!!!!!!! So remember kids, dont boat and drink, dont drive and drink ... and finally dont let your GF get drunk too!!!!!! but thats another story!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

good thing for everyone else on the water you guys left the plugs out...sounds like you all were drunk before you even got the boat launched.....

 

[bobinphx]

Re: Funny Ramp Stories/ Boat Ramp Watching

good thing for everyone else on the water you guys left the plugs out...sounds like you all were drunk before you even got the boat launched.....

Nope, not drunk.. just young and stupid. To this day my wife says that someone upstairs protects children and idiots ... and she says I am covered on both fronts!!

 

[Wall eye]

Re: Funny Ramp Stories/ Boat Ramp Watching

Two Funny Ramp stories, one at my own expense
1) My family and I got in line (long line) to launch our boat. As we got closee to the front of the line we saw a guy about to launch his boat but decided to teach his wife how to back a boat up. He walked along the driver's side of the truck instructing his wife but before the boat hit the water a guy from Way....way back in line came up an tried to put that guy in-place. Well the two of them got into a bit of a fist fight. Not good???? Lake Police were right there and I made it to the front of the line faster.
2) We took our ski boat (brand new ski boat) out on it's 5th voyage with a couple of neighbors and their kids. We swam and tubed all day (great day). At the end of the day my wife drove the boat up on the trailer. I pulled the boat out of the water and went to strap it down. My wife hand me the kids from inside the boat and then I helped her down, as I made my way to the back of the boat to strap it down I heard a odd sound...it was the inboard still running!!!!!! I jumped into the boat and shutdown the engine. My wife said to me why are you acting so wierd? It couldn't have used that much gas.

 

[Hiya Bayaya]

Re: Funny Ramp Stories/ Boat Ramp Watching

YIKES, anything wrong afterwards ? Curious to know how long an engine can run without water cooling it?

 

[1979checkmate]

Re: Funny Ramp Stories/ Boat Ramp Watching

THe motor would be fine, i hope he replaced the waterpump/impeller though.

 

[Wall eye]

Re: Funny Ramp Stories/ Boat Ramp Watching

Engine was fine. I replaced the impeller, the old one did not look too bad.

 

[hrdwrkingacguy]

Re: Funny Ramp Stories/ Boat Ramp Watching

We were at the lake a couple weeks ago waiting in the staging area where there are three lanes...we are in the left lane, the middle and right lanes are people waiting to swap jet skis from one trailer to another(if they would have asked we could have picked them up and just carried them but that is another story)...In the middle lane in the water is a family with a bayliner(kinda like the one we just got rid of) they have the boat two feet out of the water(the trailer isn't backed up far enough) and someone is in the water with waders pulling on a rope to get the boat off the trailer...The line is getting longer behind us...They eventually figure out to back in further and they pull the boat with a line off the trailer...Someone is still in the water with waders and the line in their hand at this point....Then the boat comes off the trailer and turns perpendicular(90 degrees) and blocks off two of the three lanes of the launch for 10 minutes while they try to get it started...They eventually pulled off to the side and couldn't get it started...We launched did our thing for a couple hours and when we came back they were in the same place doing the same thing and we recovered and left...Ever since they have been the "Boat on a string" people...

 

[ttugrad]

I got one!

I got one!

Today I was at the dock about ready to get my truck and load up and came upon a very large guy in the water screaming obsenities at a person jack knifing a trailer on the ramp. I thought of the forum and settled in to watch....

The guy had lanched his boat without the plug and it was taking on water. His friend had pulled the boat back up the ramp. The big guy in the boat realized what was happening and took to the water with his thumb in the plug hole, hoping to keep it from sinking. Somehow the guy in the truck caught wind of what was going on and turned around with the trailer, obvously having no clue how to back it, and was all over the ramp. The guy in the water kept screaming at him to "watch the #@!! truck! The guy finally got the trailer in place and he too took to the water with a plug for the boat. By the time the two of them got the boat on the trailer, the boat looked like it was about 1/3 full of water. I was amazed that the truck, actually an Escalade ESV, got it up the ramp as easily as it did. I have never seen as much water come out of a plug as this this one. The guy said he thought it was OK as the water didn't get above the top of the distributor.....

While watching I got to do a good deed: a family with a daughter had brought a bunch of pre-teen girls to the lake for her birthday. They had a dead battery and were about ready to load up to go home (no way at this ramp to run a jump start from a vehicle) I had an extra battery in the truck and lent it to them. We exchanged information and they are to bring the battery by the house tomorrow. Think I'll get it back?

 

[j_martin]

Re: I got one!

Re: I got one!

Think I'll get it back?

Along with a dozen cookies and a sample of the birthday cake.

 

[infideltarget]

Re: I got one!

Re: I got one!

Think I'll get it back?

Even if you don't...it (the good deed) will come back to you in another way one day, when you really need it!

 

[Calglass19]

Re: I got one!

Re: I got one!

Many years ago my wife (then GF) were camping at a provincial park near Lindsay, ON. This park has two 2 lane ramps. A shallow gravel one for small crafts, and a deeper concrete one for larger crafts. I had a 14' tri-hull at the time and was waiting my turn in line at the big ramp. I could have used either ramp, but the small ramp was tied up. A guy launching a jet-ski with his motorhome was stuck in the gravel.

Just ahead of me in line was this husband and wife with their brand new big boat and their brand new Chevy Suburban, the boat was probably 24' or better. Now, this boat is much larger than any other boats that normally get launched here, mostly open boats up to 18' use this area. These were "Money people", my wife said.

The wife was out of the truck, yelling and carrying on about how people are stupid for taking so long at the ramp, she was pacing, and cursing and actually yelling at the people launching! Making a scene and being obnoxious.

It was finally their turn. She grabs the bow line, yells at hubby to get his *** in gear and get down the ramp. He wiggles and wobbles down towards the ramp, several attempts made to get it straight. (Her screaming at him that he's an idiot the whole time) Finally gets it near the water, but takes up both lanes. He asks her to check the plug. She says shes not an idiot, of course its in there. (It actually was, no problems there). OK he says. Transom straps off?, he asks. Same response from her. OK he says.

Back into the water. Boat stays. Back farther. Boat stays. Back farther so the back doors of the 'burban are almost in the water. Boat stays. She calls him an idiot. Boat stays.

My wife and I are laughing pretty hard by now. We're all prepped and ready for our turn.

He pulls up the ramp, backs down and hits the brakes...boat stays. She's freaking out by now. Literally throwing a tantrum on the ramp. Screaming, yelling stamping her feet.

He pulls out, up the ramp. Gets out of the truck, walks to the back of the boat, and sees the transom straps still on the trailer. Without a word he looks at her, undoes the straps and launches fine. Pulls the truck/trailer out and parks leaving her standing at the dock holding the bow line and a rear line. She didn't say a single word.:facepalm:

My turn. My wife jumps out, takes the bow and stern lines. Winch and straps are undone already (Flat trailer, my boat MUST float off this trailer, it would never slide off dry). I back down the ramp, boat floats, wife says "OK!", back into Drive, and park the truck. 30 seconds on the ramp.

I get back to the dock and my wife has already manouvered it around the end of the dock to clear the ramp for the next boater. We hop in, hit the key and fire the 50 up. The woman is just glaring from the other dock.

Wife and I still talk about that woman when we see people "losing it" at a ramp.

Looked good on her.