Am I the only stay at home dad?

neumanns · Jan 20, 2005

I have been around here awhile and never really seen it mentioned. I have never really mentioned in the job threads etc. We have three kids with one on the way, ages 6/4/1/ due in july. For the last 3 years I have considered myself Stay at home. I work some but Mom works 40+ on nights 12 hr shifts on a two week revolving schedule that allows us five or more consecutive days off every two weeks. The scedule is not set so it would make me very irregular to schedule. Financially were alright so we use the spare time to camp and play etc. Things will proabably stay this way at least till the youngest is in school so proabably another six years minimum. I do enjoy it immensley, oh sure there are aspects of it I could do without. I was up a good portion of last night, the youngest has caught a cold from his sister and was misserable. Today is laundry day you get the idea. but overall it is very enjoyable and I relish the time with them. It took me awhile to adjust, admitting your mister mom was a little toufgh on the masculinity image

but it does definatly have it's benifits in many area's.

KaGee · Jan 20, 2005

Re: Am I the only stay at home dad?

Phatman Mike said he was a Mr. Mom a while back. So glad my two are raised and out on their own. My wife was a fulltime wife, mother and homemaker. But that's not to say I did not do my part. It was very difficult at times with money. But we survived.

kenimpzoom · Jan 20, 2005

Re: Am I the only stay at home dad?

I would be glad to be a stay at home dad. Actually, I wish parents could rotate every month. Ken

one more cast · Jan 20, 2005

Re: Am I the only stay at home dad?

I wasn't a stay at home mom but rather a second shift Mr. Mom for a few years. I worked 7-3 and my wife (X) worked from 3-11:30. so I had the kids after school.Being mr.mom is hard work.

Elmer Fudge · Jan 20, 2005

Re: Am I the only stay at home dad?

neumanns you're doing fine,most of the men that i know would love to be able to afford the time it takes to raise their kids, in most families with a stay at home parent,the lower wage earner's job or career is sacrificed,the majority of the time it's the womans career that takes a back seat,it so happens that you maybe the exception to that trend,the masculinity image stuff that is commonly portrayed is for shallow minded life-forms, real men do whatever it takes to provide the necessities for a decent family environment,materialism is never the religion of choice for such a man.

Mark42 · Jan 20, 2005

Re: Am I the only stay at home dad?

My brother is the one home with their son, age 16 mo. If he stays home a few more years, he will have a heck of a time finding employment in his line of work. He will be 50 this fall.

NYMINUTE · Jan 20, 2005

Re: Am I the only stay at home dad?

Originally posted by KenImpZoom: I would be glad to be a stay at home dad. Actually, I wish parents could rotate every month. Ken

Ditto here Ken, One of the two parents fulltime. I am with those that feel the collapse of values is a result of the two working parent society. Obviously the economy has dictated the necessity of multiple incomes, but there are as Neumanns said ways to make it work. My generation (Boomers) is a want it, have it, want more NOW group. In the interest of achieving our personal desires we farmed the kids out to daycare, schools, and worst of all home alones. The results are abundantly documented. Gangs, drug abuse, juvenile thefts, and so forth. Guys like Neumanns need to be recognized as trend setters, not LAZY.

RetNav · Jan 20, 2005

Re: Am I the only stay at home dad?

neumanns, you are not the only full time stay at home dad. My wife is an RN and works full time. I am retired and now care for our 10 month old daughter. Only problem is she does not get what fishing is about yet.

As soon as she is old enough to hold a pole, rod or any fishing gear it will change. With my first kids, boy and girl, I was gone most of the time they were growing up. Missed out on a lot of time being deployed in the navy. After I got married again and had kids I promised myself that I would not be gone from them. So far I have been able to endure it. It is a full time full time job. Like right now, Little girl is screaming, gotta go...

ehenry · Jan 20, 2005

Re: Am I the only stay at home dad?

Elmer, I like the way you think ! ! ! Very well put ! !

neumanns · Jan 20, 2005

Re: Am I the only stay at home dad?

WOW...Thanks guy's. Always kinda wondered how others viewed it but was always a little hesitant to broach it in such a public place where ya really feel like ya know (& respect) a lot of the people quit well. There were a lot of factors that went into this choice most of wich have already been mentioned above. first the cost of daycare would be prohibitive but morso we wanted to be the ones to raise our kids. It was the way we were raised and felt it was the best way to go for us. Mom would love to stay home but the simple fact is we are much better of on her income than mine. There are always things we could do with extra money and places it would come in nice but we want for nothing. One of the things that amazes me most is how often when I am out with the kid's I get comments like...Your turn to watch them huh...Must be your weekend...and my personal favorite, Babysitting huh. and my unfailing response " They tell me when they are your's it's called raising them". The general assumption is not that they are mine, from a happy marriage, and I am in the position by choice. Retnav, my wife is also an RN in the Emregency room. As for the fishing, that's a fantasy of mine. We spend a lot of the summer on the pontoon but far more of it is spent swimming than fishing. However I do often get to dabble for sunnies while they swim and occasinally come up to catch a fish with me. They do love playing with my bait and whatever I happen to get lucky enoufgh to catch at the swimminghole theyb play with that till they decide to let it go to be with it's family. That's alright tho it's all quality time that will be gone all to soon. Swimming it is.

aspeck · Jan 20, 2005

Re: Am I the only stay at home dad?

neumanns, you da man! I applaud you for your descision and effort. A+ job well done, sir! My wife is the "stay at home" Mom, but I am fortunate to have a job with strange hours. Some are at home, others away from home, but I get to spend a large amount of time with the family. Even when I am in the office (stateside) home is only a few hundred yards away, so they come to the office, or I sneak home from time to time. When we are in Ghana, we are living and working in the same building, so I am with them near 24/7. Only time this arrangement stinks is when they are in the States and I am still in Ghana. So, 3 or 4 months out of the year we pay for the arrangement we have. By the way, littles aspeck (now 3 1/2) asks to go fishing from time to time, and just yesterday was playing "shoot the buck." She has her imaginary rifle and would say, "There is one." Then she would shot. The first one was a buck with 3 points on both sides. The second one had 2 points on one side and 3 on the other. The next 3 were does. She is getting to be quite the hunter!

Kenneth Brown · Jan 20, 2005

Re: Am I the only stay at home dad?

Oh my gosh guys, I see myself. My wife works on the weekends and goes to school during the week. Get this- She is a LVN and works in the ER. She has already been offered the RN spot when she graduates and will also be the charge nurse. I am so Mr. Mom it ain't even funny. I don't look at it as babysitting either, they are mine and its my job. I still work full time and have the kids. I told her that whenever she is done and our bills are all caught up I am going into the farming full time along with being a stay at home dad. She thinks its a good idea. I don't know though, I've just about quit drinking, don't hardly know what fishing or hunting is anymore, and sure would like a guys night out.

Parrott_head · Jan 20, 2005

Re: Am I the only stay at home dad?

Neumanns, Hats off to you! I work a rotation with days off in the middle of the week. Wife works a Mon-Fri gig. Doctor visits, school visits, anything like that get set up for my days off. I enjoy the time with the kids and they see more of me than most of their friends see of their father. There is not a greater thing you can do than provide a safe, caring home for your children. Parrott_head

Link · Jan 20, 2005

Re: Am I the only stay at home dad?

We call it the oppps factor here neumanns. Have known two guys here in this area in the past 20 years who in their mid 40s decided to be stay at home dads. Oddly enough both of their wives were RNs. Got a email titled Opps from one of Mrs.Links younger sisters. She was 39 and Hubby 47... right in the middle of Med school she had a baby. Mike has been a stay at home Dad for the last 4 years. They just got stationed in Alaska last year. Mike said it was the toughest thing he ever did. Add the fact that he had never been around kids let alone a baby before!

Not an easy job at all!

DJ · Jan 20, 2005

Re: Am I the only stay at home dad?

neumanns, I'm not a stay at home dad. However, my office is in my house, so I've been close. My wife was a stay at home mom. Plus, she/we home educated, I would not trade either. Hats off to you. Raise those babies right.

deputydawg · Jan 21, 2005

Re: Am I the only stay at home dad?

I am kind of a stay at home dad. My wife has been in college at the University of Nebraska as a full time student. I work night shift 6am til 6pm, rotating between 5 and 6 days a week, and stay home with my 3 kids during the days. My wife left for school around 7:30 until about 5. My kids are now 17 months, 3 and 4. Wife graduated in december with honors so she is home days now, but is starting to work now. Back to the same schedule as before. I am always worn out, but it is well worth it. I only miss an hour of my kids lives each day close to bedtime. I wouldn't trade this for anything.

12Footer · Jan 21, 2005

Re: Am I the only stay at home dad?

Ooooooo what a lucky man-- He was! I am Mr Mom only in my dreams. I "retired" for 12weeks, but had to get a new job due "cobra" premiums, which took a huge chunk out of my pension. The kids (except for one "yo-yo youngun") are now out of the house, and it would be a good time to take time.But I can't. Some day,man.

DC698 · Jan 21, 2005

Re: Am I the only stay at home dad?

My wife stays home with the kids now, after working full time for 10+ years. She decided it was best(and I agree) for our two little ones. She didnt want to miss out on the beginning years and memories. I still dont know how she does it though, 5 days a week for 8-9 hours a day, alone. It is definately a hard job taking care of a 3 1/2 and 1 1/2 year old. When she leaves me with the two little ones to go grocery shopping, etc, for 2-3 hours, I am usually at wits end by the time she gets back!

Hats off to you Neumans for having the patience (sp?) to stay home! Don't get me wrong though, I love my kids, and love spending time with them. (Hopefully my 3 1/2 yr. old daughter will be skiing this summer!)

Barlow · Jan 21, 2005

Re: Am I the only stay at home dad?

I don't have kids but, I hand it to you men that do this.. very respectable and in most cases I've seen - better for the kids. I have a nieghbor thats a stay at home dad with 3 kids their youngest son is 2 and was just diagnosed with Autism.. Wife has a good job/ paying as well as an Accountant for a large builder so they've been doing alright with their finances. He works P.T. 2 nights a week for a few hours a night to bring in a few extra bucks and get out of the house. A great couple! and 3 great kids! Thing is now they're confronted not only emotionally but, financially by their youngests condition.. very tough time for them due to this and they are torn between the financials of him going back to work full time and the care and attention/care their son needs. I'm hoping that they'll be able to continue with what has worked SOO well for them. I'm not sure why I share this but, I guess its in support for you men that have done this,.. very respectable!

phatmanmike · Jan 21, 2005

Re: Am I the only stay at home dad?

Phatman Mike said he was a Mr. Mom a while back

yes yes yes.... yes i did, and yes i am. the wife is a local postal carrier in gulfport, florida. i am attending the PINELLAS TECHNICAL EDUCATION CENTER a.k.a PTEC, and i am in my 3rd week of a 12 month course, im gonna be an electrician. yee haw i am in school from 7am till noon. i get up, wake up amanda(4 year old daughter), breakfast, get dressed, take her to private day school/ pre-k( no public schools here, buddy), then i go to class till noon, come home, make lunch, clean a lil bit, vacuum, hit iboats.com for a few, maybe take a nap, ride my buddy;s dirt bikes around the neighborhood, and then pick up amanda at school at 5 pm. come home, cook dinner, eat dinner, clean up from dinner, watch the simpsons, watch seinfeld, give amanda a bath, brush her hair, brush her teeth, read hera story, and put her to bed. then its back to iboats.com again for a few. check my ebay listings for any "progress", watch the news for a few, hit ibaots.com again, put laundry in the dryer, take the dog out for potty, feed the fish,feed the rats, check the rats water bottle, take a shower, brush teeth , go to bed...... ......repeat. A KEENE OBSERVER WILL NOTE THE LACK OF THE WORD..."WORK"....IN THAT LAST PARAGRAPH!!!!!

my wife leaves for work at 6 am for a 1 hour drive to the post office and has a walking route that she carries. it takes her about 6 hours of walking , and maybe 3 hours total either in the truck or at the shop. so she dont get back home till after 6 pm.so i do a good 90% of the HOUSE stuff, cook, clean, laundry, etc. besides, my wifes cooking is scarey!!!!! once, she was re-heating left over spaghetti, and burned it. .....HOW IN BLUE BLAZES DO YOU BURN LEFTOVERS WHILE RE-HEATING THEM !!!!! anywas i havent worked since oct.2003, yes i said 2003

i got laid off and pulled unemplyment for about 3 months, and have been a full time student ever since, previously at saint petersburg college, and now at PTEC. ive got 11 months left, and then i have to find work as an electrician. oh boy, wish me luck. so to answer your question, NO, youre not the only stay at home dad. the wife makes great money, but she still hates me everytime i tell her i took a nap at the beach while she was working

ahahahahahaha

Am I the only stay at home dad?

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