Ya might want to think about it first

LubeDude

Admiral
Joined
Oct 8, 2003
Messages
6,945
I was riding to work yesterday when I observed a female driver, who cut right in front of a pickup truck, causing the driver to drive onto the shoulder to avoid hitting her.
This evidently angered the driver enough that he hung his arm out his window and gave the woman the middle finger wave.
"Man, that guy is stupid," I thought to myself. I ALWAYS smile nicely and wave in a sheepish manner whenever a female does anything to me in traffic, and here's why:
I drive 48 miles each way every day to work.
That's 96 miles each day. Of these, 16 miles each way is bumper-to-bumper. Most of the bumper-to-bumper is on an 8 lane highway. There are 7 cars every 40 feet for 32 miles. That works out to 982 cars every mile, or 31,424 cars. Even though the rest of the 32 miles is not bumper-to-bumper, I figure I pass at least another 4000 cars. That brings the number to something like 36,000 cars that I pass every day. Statistically, females drive half of these. That's 18,000 women drivers! In any given group of females, 1 in 28 has PMS. That's 642.
According to Cosmopolitan, 70% describe their love life as dissatisfying or unrewarding. That's 449.
According to the National Institute of Health, 22% of all females have seriously considered suicide or homicide. That's 98. And 34% describe men as their biggest problem. That's 33. According to the National Rifle Association, 5% of all females carry weapons and this number is increasing. That means that EVERY SINGLE DAY, I drive past at least one female that has a lousy love life, thinks men are her biggest problem, has
seriously considered suicide or homicide, has PMS, and is armed.
Give her the finger? I don't think so.
 

QC

Supreme Mariner
Joined
Mar 22, 2005
Messages
22,783
Re: Ya might want to think about it first

What the heck is Mrs. QC doin' in Oregon?
 
Joined
Jun 1, 2005
Messages
4,666
Re: Ya might want to think about it first

A copy of this communication will be placed in your 201 file.
 

KaGee

Admiral
Joined
Aug 14, 2004
Messages
7,069
Re: Ya might want to think about it first

You got that right brother! Don't be sticking anything out... unless it's to hand her a box of chocolates! 8)
 

bassboy1

Lieutenant Commander
Joined
Jun 23, 2006
Messages
1,884
Re: Ya might want to think about it first

According to your math, how many have all at once?:devil:
 

stan_deezy

Lieutenant Commander
Joined
Oct 18, 2003
Messages
1,539
Re: Ya might want to think about it first

I'm goning to use this in a lecture soon.

You've just made me realise how dangerous my job is :^:^
 

Reel Poor

Vice Admiral
Joined
Jan 29, 2005
Messages
5,522
Re: Ya might want to think about it first

QC said:
What the heck is Mrs. QC doin' in Oregon?

kwitcherbitchin.........At least your getting a break. :p

 

xtraham

Lieutenant
Joined
Jul 20, 2006
Messages
1,425
Re: Ya might want to think about it first

she probably caused him to drop his cell phone in his coffee while he was shaving and reading the paper.......
 
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