Hug your children.

[Mike NZ]

I want you to imagine you went into your childs room and they were not there and they are not coming back, ever. No more crayons on the wall or bikes on the drive. The toys will always be neat & tidy, no food on the loungsuite or plastic boats left in the bath. That little one that gets into your boat and leaves the electrics on, and pees all over the toilet floor and spreads toothpaste all over the sink. All these things are now gone forever and you wish they were here to do them. Tuck them in, read a book, all the things we take for granted and expect to do. I had the undesirable task of burying my newborn son the other day and I'm seeing just about everything in a new light. Now you guys are the best and I know you will respond thoughtfully. What I would like you to do is, leave the keyboard find you son or daughter hold them tight and tell them how valuable they are. Next time they mess up big time and they will, just say its OK we all make mistakes, you know you are a great kid, I love you. My wife and I are doing fine and getting on with our lives. We are not without hope. God Bless you all. Mike.

 

[JB]

Re: Hug your children.

My heart breaks for you and your wife, Mike.<br /><br />Mine are all gone. Making their own lives and lives for their children and grandchildren. I am alone now, but I often sit and count the blessings of the memories they gave me.<br /><br />I have tried a few times to imagine how I would feel if I lost one of them, but my mind's self protection mechanism refuses to even contemplate such an event.<br /><br />I tell them each, at least once a week, that I love them.<br /><br />I wish you more children, complete with the joys and agonies of life with them.

 

[Boatsrule]

Re: Hug your children.

My wife and I are so sorry for your loss. You and your family will be in our prayers.<br />You keep the memories alive with pictures.<br /><br />Thanks for the reality check, I will head home tonight and hold all three girls, and of course my wife. <br />Take care, Rob

 

[mellowyellow]

Re: Hug your children.

Dear Mike,<br />all I can say is I am very sorry for your loss.<br />I can't imagine how hard it must have been.<br />I have a 14yr old son, 12yr old daughter and<br />the boss of the house, my 4yr old son.<br />without them and my wife, I would be lost in this<br />world. I tell them every day that I love them<br />and try to show them the affection that my dad<br />was not able to show me, even though I sometimes<br />have to fight my 14yr old for a hug.<br />you and yours will be in my prayers.....<br />warmest regards,<br />M.Y.

 

[ehenry]

Re: Hug your children.

Mike, my heart breaks with you. I know first hand of the heart break and pain you and your wife are going through. I held my newborn daughter, Kayla Rinne, while she died due to a congeniatal birth defect. We were able to sing lulabys to her and pray for her and let her know she was loved. I don't know the circumstances surrounding the loss of your child. But know this, only if we know them for a brief period, all children are blessings. For those of us who have lost our children, we have our special angels to watch over us and our families now. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers my friend.<br /><br />Sincerly,

 

[KeltonKrew]

Re: Hug your children.

Mike,<br /><br />I can't say I know "exacly" how you feel, but I can come close. When I was 14, I lost my 11 year old brother to a tragic accident. I saw what my parents went through. I even went to conseling with them.<br /><br />Like them, you will make it through with good friends and prayer. God will not give any of us more than we can handle and believe me, He is with you every second. Keep your friends and your Faith!<br /><br />I now have 2 daughters (9 & 5) and now couldn't possibly imagine them not being here tomorrow, although that is not in my hands. <br /><br />Mike, I take your words of encouragement and spend a great deal of time with my kids because no one knows what tomorrow will bring.<br /><br />Once again, I feel for your loss and you and your family will be in my prayers.

 

[blifsey]

Re: Hug your children.

Mike,<br /><br />I am so deeply sorry to hear of your loss but grateful you and your wife are finding the courage and path to get on with your lives. I will keep you and your's in my prayers. I feel humbled that you would take this time to remind us all how precious children are. May God bless and guide you during this time.<br /><br />BL...

 

[ebbtide176]

Re: Hug your children.

i'm sorry for your loss

 

[bubbakat]

Re: Hug your children.

i greive with you lost one myself and still hurts after 32 years only son i ever had but still have two lovely daughters and two grandaughters and the third on the way don't go a day without telling them i love them hoping for a grandson this time around but your loss will get easier but not gone hang in there and give my best to the mom gods love and speed be with you

 

[Mike NZ]

Re: Hug your children.

Well I never expected this post to get bumped up to the top again. I was so touched by the original 30 posts that I printed them all off so the lost posts are all saved. It would appear that the wiped material went right through the middle of this thread so the first 4 posts survived and the rest were wiped. To efhenry Keltonkrew HotByte ebb & bubbakat it has been about a month since our baby died and as the topic is timeless your thoughts are greatly appreciated. As bubbakat points out after 32 years it still hurts for him so after a month the wound is still pretty raw. Death is not really a topic we willingly discuss but if being forced to re-examine our priorities and our own mortality, maybe its no accident that this post is being looked at again. The motivation behind the thread is to get us to appreciate our children, not taking them for granted, but to initiate a lasting change in how we view and relate to them. We don't have them forever and may well attend their funeral someday. The strength of a nation is the family, the strength of the families are the fathers. Lets be the best fathers we can possibly be.

 

[SCO]

Re: Hug your children.

Yes Mike, thank you. I am sorry for your loss. I will hug mine today with special meaning. To being a better Father.

 

[12Footer]

Re: Hug your children.

Yes, but many of the replies are no longer there,are they? Oh well, You allready read them,but just want you to know, as hard as it is to imagine losing one of my own, It allways brings a tear to my eye when i see a wee one lose thier life.<br />My heart goes out to you and your wife.

 

[Capt. Bob]

Re: Hug your children.

Mike,<br />When you first posted the tragedy that you and your wife are going through, I had punished my 18 year old son for a low grade on his progress report that day. Your post touched my heart and I found myself realizing that I had over-reacted to his situation. I started thinking how we only have months to spend together before he is off to the Navy and I to following my dream. I decided to retract the punishment and told him how special he is to me and we agreed to spend the rest of our time together being happy and enjoying each other more. I love this kid with all my heart and I will dearly miss his daily company when he goes. He is the last of my six to start their adult life and I have missed the babies, the toddlers, the children and the teenagers. I wish I could live those parts over again.<br />My heart goes out to you both and what you will miss with that child, but I hope you have another and give it twice as much love.

 

[mako]

Re: Hug your children.

I hugged and kissed my son the night I first read your post and I just went and did the same again. My son is my life and I can't imagine the pain of your loss. God bless you and you wife. And I'm sure your son is in a better place now, as hard as it is to deal with that!