Husband Sore<br /><br />A store that sells new husbands has just opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates.<br /><br />You may visit the store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the attributes of the men increase as the shopper ascends the flights.<br /><br />There is, however, a catch: you may choose any man from a particular floor, or you may choose to go up a floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!<br /><br />So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband.<br /><br />On the first floor the sign on the door reads: Floor 1 - These men have jobs<br /><br />The second floor sign reads: Floor 2 - These men have jobs and love kids.<br /><br />The third floor sign reads: Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love kids, and are extremely good looking.<br /><br />"Wow," she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.<br /><br />She goes to the fourth floor and sign reads: Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love kids, are drop-dead good looking and help with the housework.<br /><br />"Oh, mercy me!" she exclaims, "I can hardly stand it!"<br /><br />Still, she goes to the fifth floor and sign reads: Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love kids, are drop-dead gorgeous, help with the housework, and have a strong romantic streak.<br /><br />She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor and the sign reads: Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please.Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.<br />PS<br />A NEW WIVES STORE opened across the street.<br /><br />The first floor has wives that love sex.<br /><br />The second floor has wives that love sex and have money.<br /><br />The third through sixth floors have never been visited.<br />-------------------------------------------------<br /><br />Popsicle<br /><br /> The only way to pull off a Sunday afternoon quickie with their 8 year old<br />son in the apartment was to send him out on the balcony with a Popsicle<br />and tell him<br />to report on all the neighborhood activities.<br /><br />He began his commentary as his parents put their plan into operation:<br /><br />"There's a car being towed from the parking lot", he shouted.<br /><br />A few moments passed ... "An ambulance just drove by"<br /><br />A few moments later, "Looks like the Anderson's have company", he called<br />out.<br /><br />"Matt's riding a new bike....."<br /><br />A few moments later, Looks like the Sanders are moving"<br /><br />"Jason is on his skate board...."<br /><br />A few more moments, "The Coopers are having s*x!!"<br /><br />Startled, Mother and Dad shot up in bed!!!<br /><br />Dad cautiously asked, "How do you know they are having s*x?"<br /><br />"Jimmy Cooper is standing on his balcony with a Popsicle too."<br /> 
