Scary News About Middle-Born Children

LadyFish

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Mar 18, 2003
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Inequality begins at home. The children born in the middle of the family are at a much higher risk than their older or younger siblings of not being as successful as an adult. It's not about birth order. It's about the pecking order--and the economic disparities that naturally occur based on where you land in that order. So says New York University sociologist Dalton Conley, author of the groundbreaking book "The Pecking Order: Which Siblings Succeed and Why." His startling conclusions are based on an exhaustive data analysis of the 1990 United States Census, the General Social Survey conducted by the University of Chicago over the last 30 years, and a landmark study that was launched in 1968 by the University of Michigan, as well 175 interviews with 75 families from around the country.<br /><br />Does birth order determine success? The answer may surprise you.<br /><br />Conley's premise: Middle-born children, who never have the experience of being the only child in the family, suffer financially compared with their siblings.<br />The New York Times reports that Conley's research uncovered these disheartening facts:<br />--Middles are less likely to receive financial support for their education.<br />--Middles may do less well in school than their siblings.<br />--The chance that middle-borns will attend a private school drops by 25 percent with the birth of a third child.<br />--The chance that middles will be held back a year in school increases severalfold with the birth of a third child. <br /><br />OMG I'm the middle child out of 5, they make it sound like I'm doomed and that all my hard work was for naught.<br /><br />Good thing I only believe half of what I read.<br /><br />I do agree us middle children are different in many respects but I don't buy the less likely to succeed theory.
 

gaugeguy

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Re: Scary News About Middle-Born Children

Oldest of three. My younger brother (the middle) is probably the most successful in the family. He did the worst at school, but things fell into place well for him. <br /><br />We established a pecking order at a young age. We are all in our mid 30's now. I still have the fear instilled in them because of the beatings I laid on them 25 or more years ago :cool:
 

ChrisMcLaughlin

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Jan 22, 2004
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Re: Scary News About Middle-Born Children

Ladyfish,<br />I too am a middle child of five. I never felt the way or was subjected to the things this report says. Dalton Conley must be the oldest of five and has dumb siblings. :D :D :D :D
 

SS MAYFLOAT

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May 17, 2001
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Re: Scary News About Middle-Born Children

Sorry Ladyfish, I don't buy that. Such few interveiws for a population over 230 million.<br /><br /> My brother and sister that are in the middle are doing very well for themselves. Better than me the baby of the family and better than the oldest sister which is an old maid.<br /><br />You seem to be a very well educated person from what I read of your posts. I don't think being in the middle has really much to do with ones outcome.
 

SpinnerBait_Nut

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Re: Scary News About Middle-Born Children

I was the oldest of 2 but now there's just me. :( <br /><br />But we had no pecking order.<br />We just got along.<br /><br />He was my little brother and I took care of him.
 

Carphunter

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Aug 11, 2002
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Re: Scary News About Middle-Born Children

I'm the youngest, and I didn't amount to nothin. :( ........ :D <br /><br />I blame it on my two older brothers for suckin the money outta Mom and Dad before I was born. :mad: ..... :D
 

POINTER94

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Oct 12, 2003
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Re: Scary News About Middle-Born Children

Middle of three. Sounds like blaming something for someone for somereason.. A BUNCH OF HOOEY.<br /><br />Try hard - suceed. did you ever notice that those who work the hardest are the luckiest???? :p
 

KennyKenCan

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Aug 26, 2002
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Re: Scary News About Middle-Born Children

LadiFsh,<br /><br />Mi too b #4 of 5.<br /><br />And lok me, i trned ot gooder.<br /><br />I gt beet up bi mi broters all de tim.<br /><br />Nutin roung wit mi!<br /><br />Unt mi sistr, blamd mi fr evryting.<br /><br />Stil, nuting roung wit mi!<br /><br />I dn't git it!<br /><br />Mabe it b da techrs I hd?<br /><br />I dn't no.<br /><br />Unt lok at mi now, I b a engineeeeeeer!<br /><br />Unt mi cn't beleve thy tok 30 yers ta stdy it!<br /><br />Ifn yu figr ot wat I sad, yu wil git a dat wit de iboats grl.<br /><br />Goddr lck
 

samagee

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Aug 7, 2003
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Re: Scary News About Middle-Born Children

Woohooo I win a date with the iboats girl!<br /><br />This study they did has way to low of a survey pool. It's hog wash.
 

KennyKenCan

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Aug 26, 2002
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Re: Scary News About Middle-Born Children

samagee,<br /><br />Yu gtta figr evythn, ta wiin!<br /><br />Dat iboats grl dn't cume dat esy!
 

JB

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Re: Scary News About Middle-Born Children

A Lot of exceptions to Conley's conclusions, right here in iboats.<br /><br />I, too am #3 of 5. No bux for college, joined the Navy right out of High School (in fact, I graduated 2 months after I left school to join up). I was a mediocre student, at best, and constantly compared to my elder siblings who did very well in HS.<br /><br />Took me years to overcome feelings of inferiority. Started college at night when I was 30. Discovered that out of the shadows of my elder siblings I was a superior learner, writer and teacher. Got the Ph.D when I was 60, Summa Cum Laude.<br /><br />My siblings were all successful, so was I. Never wondered if I was more or less successful than they, but growing up "in the middle" was no picnic.<br /><br />Of my 4 children, #2 has made the most of her life. . .so far, but all have done well.
 

JoeW

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Re: Scary News About Middle-Born Children

Hey JB, <br />We've got a few things in common. I was #4 out of 5 kids. I was a mediocre student through high school, joined the Army right after HS. Next month, at 45, I will graduate with honors (Bachelor's) from the University of San Francisco.
 

JB

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Re: Scary News About Middle-Born Children

Great, Joe! And congratulations!
 

Kiwi Phil

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Jun 23, 2003
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Re: Scary News About Middle-Born Children

Ladyfish, I have heard this before and am not too sure if it applies.<br />There are 4 of us, 3 within 4.5yrs, 1 10yrs later.<br />The 1st 3 of us have all been sucessful in business. There's me, then No2 has a couple of internation publications out of Europe, plus is President of a European organisation. The 3rd manufactures fishing lures etc in a big way. (even sells them in to the States thru a company in Dakota).<br />No4 who had all the financial brakes (parents were better off then) works for a wage in a trade, and lives about 4 miles from where he was born.<br />Personally I think it is the attitude of the parents that makes the difference. Mother gave us 3 some brilliant lessons (continually), and I believe we left home with a fearless attitude about what we could achieve. Failure has never been an issue. <br />Oh, by the way Ladyfish,I enjoy reading and replying to the subjects you post. They are really good and bring a very different quality to the net. You must certainly know a lot about us, just as I am leaning a lot about others from their replies. It's good.<br />Cheers<br />Phillip
 

tylerin

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Jul 25, 2003
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Re: Scary News About Middle-Born Children

Youngest of 3. Lumps to prove it. Middle child working on her PHD. All of us doing well financially. I'm the happiest though, and thats how I define success. :)
 

kenimpzoom

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Jul 13, 2002
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Re: Scary News About Middle-Born Children

Wrong!<br /><br />My brother was the middle of us three, and he is the best off moneywise.<br /><br />We all fought like cats and dogs growing up, now we get along great.<br /><br />Ken
 

gaugeguy

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Jun 4, 2003
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Re: Scary News About Middle-Born Children

Perhaps this study was a way for Dr. Conley to explain why his siblings are so much more successful than him :rolleyes:
 

Parrott_head

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Feb 15, 2002
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Re: Scary News About Middle-Born Children

I'm the middle of three boys. <br />Not sure where we placed in affection in our parents hearts so I guess we were all treated about the same.<br /><br />Older brother was abusive to me in the extreme.<br />Cannot recall how many times he would sit on my back and pound me with his fists.<br /><br />When he was 17 and I was 14 I had grown taller than him and this caused some friction. His buddies would rib him over it and that just made it worse for me. One day we were loading older brothers car to go visit our father. Older brother got mad at youngest brother over a very trivial thing and started to waylay him.<br /><br />Younger brother was maybe 10 at the time and small for his age.<br /><br />I snapped.<br /><br />I did my oldler like he had done me for years, I never gave him a chance. I came up behind him and wrapped my arm around his neck and jerked him backwards using my hip as a pivot. I got his feet off the ground pretty easy and the jerked him on over and slammed him into the cement driveway head first. There was an odd sound had his head hit and he went limp instantly.<br /><br />I looked at him and figured I'd killed him. I went into the house and told Mom there was a problem out front.<br /><br />We went back outside and my brother was still limp on the ground. A man from across the street was checking him and said he was unconcious but about that time he started moaning.<br />Mom was somewhat upset but the neighbor had seen the whole episode and was headed to our place when he saw my older jump my younger. He vouched for me and said my older got what he deserved. <br /><br />Things changed around the house after that.<br /><br />Still not real comfortable around my older brother but my younger one and I have a very close relationship.<br /><br />All three of us have found about the same amount of success in life but my older brothers homelife sucks and he has few friends.<br /><br />Younger brother and I are doing much better socially.<br /><br />As a middle brother I have been told that my ability ot listen to people and tolerate others is better. I also tend to be the negotiator when things go badly between folks. Neutral abitrator so to speak.
 

Carphunter

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Re: Scary News About Middle-Born Children

Is success only measured in income?.........I think not. :)
 
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