Bassy
Lieutenant Commander
- Joined
- Aug 15, 2003
- Messages
- 1,795
Redneck Astrological Signs<br /><br />Okra December 22 - January 20<br />Although you appear crude, you are actually very slick on the inside.<br />Okra have tremendous influence. An older Okra can look back over his<br />life and see the seeds of his influence everywhere. Stay away from<br />Moon Pies.<br /><br /><br />Chitlin January 21 - February 19<br />Chitlins often come from humble backgrounds. Many times they're<br />uncomfortable talking about just where they came from. A chitlin,<br />however, can make something of himself if he's motivated and has<br />plenty of seasoning. When it comes to dealing with Chitlins, be very<br />careful. Chitlins are best with Catfish and Okra.<br />Remember that when marriage time rolls around.<br /><br />Boll Weevil February 20 - March 20<br />You have an overwhelming curiosity.<br />You're unsatisfied with the surface of things, and you feel the need<br />to bore deep into the interior of everything. Needless to say, you are<br />very intense and driven as if you had some inner hunger.<br />Nobody in their right mind is going to marry you, so don't worry about <br />it.<br /><br />Moon Pie March 21 - April 20<br />You're the type that spends a lot of time on the front porch. It's a<br />cinch to recognize the physical appearance of Moon Pies. "Big" and<br />"round" are the key words here. You should marry anybody who you can<br />get remotely interested in the idea.<br />It's not going to be easy. This might be the year to think about<br />aerobics. Maybe not.<br /><br />Possum April 21 - May 21<br />When confronted with life's difficulties, possums have a marked<br />tendency to withdraw and develop a "don't-bother-me-about-it"<br />attitude. Sometimes you become so withdrawn, people actually think<br />you're dead. This strategy is probably not psychologically healthy,<br />but seems to work for you. One day, however, it won't work, and you<br />may find your problems actually running you over.<br /><br />Crawfish May 22 - June 21<br />Crawfish is a water sign. If you work in an office, you're always<br />hanging around the water cooler. Crawfish prefer the beach to the<br />mountains, the pool to the golf course, the bathtub to the living<br />room. You tend not to be particularly attractive physically.<br /><br />Collards June 22 - July 23 
This is me!<br />Collards have a genius for communication.<br />They love to get in the "melting pot" of life and share their essence<br />with the essences of those around them. Collards make good social<br />workers, psychologists, and baseball managers. As far as your personal<br />life goes, if you are Collards stay away from Moon Pies. It just won't<br />work. Save yourself a lot of heartache.<br /><br />Catfish July 24 - August 23<br />Catfish are traditionalists in matters of the heart, with one<br />exception: Whiskers may cause problems for loved ones. You catfish are<br />never easy people to understand. You prefer the muddy bottoms to the<br />clear surface of life. Above all else, Catfish should stay away from<br />Moon Pies.<br /><br />Grits August 24 - September 23<br />Your highest aim is to be with others like yourself. You like to<br />huddle together with a big crowd of other Grits.<br />You love to travel, though, so maybe you should think about joining a<br />club. Where do you like to go? Anywhere they have cheese or gravy or<br />bacon or butter or eggs. If you can go somewhere where they have all<br />these things, that serves you well.<br /><br />Boiled Peanuts September 24 - October 23<br />You have a passionate desire to help your fellow man. Unfortunately,<br />those who know you best - your friends and loved ones - may find that<br />your personality is much too salty, and their criticism will probably<br />affect you deeply because you are really much softer than you appear.<br />You should go right ahead and marry anybody you want to because in a<br />certain way, yours is a charmed life. On the road of life, you can be<br />sure that people will always pull over and stop for you.<br /><br />Butter Bean October 24 - November 22<br />Always invite a Butter Bean because Butter Beans get along well with<br />everybody. You, as a Butter Bean, should be proud. You've grown on the<br />vine of life and you feel at home no matter what the setting. You can<br />sit next to anybody. However, you, too, shouldn't have anything to do<br />with Moon Pies.<br /><br />Armadillo November 23 - December 21<br />You have a tendency to develop a tough exterior, but you are actually<br />quite gentle. A good evening for you?Old friends, a fire, some roots,<br />fruit, worms and insects. You are a throwback. You're not concerned<br />with today's fashions and trends. You're not concerned with anything<br />about today. You're really almost prehistoric in your interests and<br />behavior patterns. You probably want to marry another Armadillo, but<br />Possum is another mating possibility.
This is me!<br />Collards have a genius for communication.<br />They love to get in the "melting pot" of life and share their essence<br />with the essences of those around them. Collards make good social<br />workers, psychologists, and baseball managers. As far as your personal<br />life goes, if you are Collards stay away from Moon Pies. It just won't<br />work. Save yourself a lot of heartache.<br /><br />Catfish July 24 - August 23<br />Catfish are traditionalists in matters of the heart, with one<br />exception: Whiskers may cause problems for loved ones. You catfish are<br />never easy people to understand. You prefer the muddy bottoms to the<br />clear surface of life. Above all else, Catfish should stay away from<br />Moon Pies.<br /><br />Grits August 24 - September 23<br />Your highest aim is to be with others like yourself. You like to<br />huddle together with a big crowd of other Grits.<br />You love to travel, though, so maybe you should think about joining a<br />club. Where do you like to go? Anywhere they have cheese or gravy or<br />bacon or butter or eggs. If you can go somewhere where they have all<br />these things, that serves you well.<br /><br />Boiled Peanuts September 24 - October 23<br />You have a passionate desire to help your fellow man. Unfortunately,<br />those who know you best - your friends and loved ones - may find that<br />your personality is much too salty, and their criticism will probably<br />affect you deeply because you are really much softer than you appear.<br />You should go right ahead and marry anybody you want to because in a<br />certain way, yours is a charmed life. On the road of life, you can be<br />sure that people will always pull over and stop for you.<br /><br />Butter Bean October 24 - November 22<br />Always invite a Butter Bean because Butter Beans get along well with<br />everybody. You, as a Butter Bean, should be proud. You've grown on the<br />vine of life and you feel at home no matter what the setting. You can<br />sit next to anybody. However, you, too, shouldn't have anything to do<br />with Moon Pies.<br /><br />Armadillo November 23 - December 21<br />You have a tendency to develop a tough exterior, but you are actually<br />quite gentle. A good evening for you?Old friends, a fire, some roots,<br />fruit, worms and insects. You are a throwback. You're not concerned<br />with today's fashions and trends. You're not concerned with anything<br />about today. You're really almost prehistoric in your interests and<br />behavior patterns. You probably want to marry another Armadillo, but<br />Possum is another mating possibility.
