More Fun With Blondes

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This blonde decides one day that she is sick and tired of all these blonde jokes and how all blondes are perceived as stupid, so she decides to show her husband that blondes really are smart. While her husband is off at work, she decides that she is going to paint a couple of rooms in the house The next day, right after her husband leaves for work, she gets down to the task at hand. <br /><br />Her husband arrives home at 5:30 and smells the distinctive smell of paint. He walks into the living room and finds his wife lying on the floor in a pool of sweat. He notices that she is wearing a ski jacket and a fur coat at the same time. <br /><br />He goes over and asks her if she is OK. She replies <br /><br />Yes." <br /><br />He asks what she is doing. She replies that she wanted to prove to him that not all blonde women are dumb and she wanted to do it by painting the house. <br /><br />He then asks her why she has a ski jacket over her fur coat. <br /><br />She replies that she was reading the directions on the paint can and they said.... <br /><br />(scroll down)... I love this one ... <br /><br />. . . <br /><br />. . . <br /><br />FOR BEST RESULTS . . . <br /><br />PUT ON TWO COATS

 

[achris]

Re: More Fun With Blondes

3 blondes walk into a bar.....<br /><br />.....<br /><br /><br />.....<br /><br /><br />.....<br /><br /><br />.....<br /><br /><br />You'd have thought the last one would have noticed!

 

[snapperbait]

Re: More Fun With Blondes

A blond stormed up to the front desk of the library and said, "I have a complaint!" <br />"Yes, ma'am?" <br /><br />"I borrowed a book last week and it was horrible!" <br /><br />"What was wrong with it?" asked the librarian. <br /><br />"It had way too many characters and there was no plot whatsoever!" <br /><br />The librarian nodded and said, "Ahh. You must be the person who took our phone book."<br />

 

[Drowned Rat]

Re: More Fun With Blondes

web page <br /><br />Click on the download word. It takes a minute or two, but it's worth it.

 

[SpinnerBait_Nut]

Re: More Fun With Blondes

DR, that has been on here a couple times already but still funny.

 

[SpinnerBait_Nut]

Re: More Fun With Blondes

An Irishman, a Mexican and a blonde guy were doing construction work on scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building. They were eating lunch and the Irishman said, "Corned beef and cabbage! If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch I'm going to jump off this building."<br /><br />The Mexican opened his lunch box and exclaimed, "Burritos again! If I get burritos one more time I'm going to jump off, too."<br /><br />The blonde opened his lunch and said, "Bologna again. If I get a bologna sandwich one more time, I'm jumping too."<br /><br />The next day the Irishman opened his lunch box, saw corned beef and cabbage and jumped to his death.<br /><br />The Mexican opened his lunch, saw a burrito and jumped too.<br /><br />The blonde guy opened his lunch, saw the bologna and jumped to his death as well.<br /><br />At the funeral, the Irishman's wife was weeping. She said, "If I'd known how really tired he was of corned beef and cabbage, I never would have given it to him again!"<br /><br />The Mexican's wife also wept and said, "I could have given him tacos or enchiladas! I didn't realize he hated burritos so much."<br /><br />Everyone turned and stared at the blonde's wife...<br /><br />"Hey, don't look at me," she said, "he makes his own lunch."

 

[Drowned Rat]

Re: More Fun With Blondes

Sorry, hadn't seen it before.

 

[Link]

Re: More Fun With Blondes

DR<br />Remember "Not all Blonds ae Dumb!

 

[SpinnerBait_Nut]

Re: More Fun With Blondes

Originally posted by Drowned Rat:<br /> Sorry, hadn't seen it before.

No problem DR. There's a lot we ain't seen for sure.

 

[one more cast]

Re: More Fun With Blondes

I try really hard to see past the blond hair but..... while waiting in a parking lot thursday I see this good looking blonde with short and i mean short shorts come out of a store and head across the parking lot,I have this thing where I try to match people to their cars so I say to myself, self, I bet she,s going to get in that red vette. well I was right. well anyway, she puts the key in the door, turns it and pulls the key out. trys the door and its still locked so she puts the key in ,turns,takes the key out. still locked.so she puts the key in, turns,pulls the key out.guess what..still locked . on the forth try she finally gets it right. Gotta love those blondes.<br />

 

[LadyFish]

Re: More Fun With Blondes

Uh huh!

 

[SpinnerBait_Nut]

Re: More Fun With Blondes

she puts the key in the door, turns it and pulls the key out. trys the door and its still locked so she puts the key in ,turns,takes the key out. still locked.so she puts the key in, turns,pulls the key out.guess what..still locked.

OMG!!!!OMG!!! Blondstar can you help?

 

[SlowlySinking]

Re: More Fun With Blondes

Wow, I'm glad my blonde hair turned white as I got old,,,,tough crowd here,,,

 

[snapperbait]

Re: More Fun With Blondes

Ladyfish.. Why you got the list out???..

Nobody mentioned or implied ANY particular names here....

 

[LadyFish]

Re: More Fun With Blondes

I dunno Snap. It just seemed like the thing to do. No worries, you still have your place at the top.

 

[snapperbait]

Re: More Fun With Blondes

 

[achris]

Re: More Fun With Blondes

I know I'm going to be crucified for this but here goes anyway,<br /><br />A blind man enters a "Ladies Bar" by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a drink. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, "Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?" The bar falls silent.<br /><br />In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke Sir, I think it's fair - given that you are blind - that you should know five things:<br /><br />1 - The bartender is a blonde girl.<br /><br />2 - The bouncer is a blonde girl.<br /><br />3 - I'm a 6 feet tall, 220 lb. blonde woman with a black belt in karate.<br /><br />4 - The woman sitting next to me is blonde and is a professional weight lifter.<br /><br />5 - The lady to your right is a blonde and is a professional wrestler."<br /><br />"Now think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"<br /><br />The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head and says, "Nah....Not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."

 

[Dunaruna]

Re: More Fun With Blondes

There goes all those 'big hug' brownie points

 

[achris]

Re: More Fun With Blondes

Oh yeah!

 

[LadyFish]

Re: More Fun With Blondes

Just because I'm in a good mood today, and to show you what a good sport I am, I'll share one with you I hadn't heard before.<br /><br />A blonde, brunette, and a redhead escaped from prison. They were running along when they came upon a dock. On the dock were three gunnysacks. They could hear the cops approaching, so the brunette suggested that they get in the sacks.<br /><br />So they got in the sacks right before the cops arrived. A cop kicked the sack with the redhead in it, and she said, "Ruff ruff ruff!" He said, "Oh, it's only a dog."<br /><br />He kicked the one with the brunette in it, and she said "Meow meow meow." He said, "Oh, it's only a cat."<br /><br />Then, he kicked the one with the blonde in it, and she said, "POTATOES POTATOES POTATOES!"