SpinnerBait_Nut
Honorary Moderator Emeritus
- Joined
- Aug 25, 2002
- Messages
- 17,651
"Previous Employment"<br /> <br />The employer asked the applicant,<br />"I see you were last employed by a psychiatrist,"<br />"Why did you leave?"<br /> <br />"Well," she replied, "I just couldn't win.<br /> <br />If I was late to work, I was hostile.<br />If I was early, I had an anxiety complex. If I was<br />on time, I was compulsive."<br /><br />______________________________________________<br />"Vicarious Learning"<br /> <br />I've always been handy at fix-it jobs around the<br />house and I've tried to train my children to follow<br />suit.<br /> <br />Recently one of my sons asked his wife to hold<br />the flashlight while he replaced a faulty electrical<br />switch.<br /> <br />Only mildly interested, she asked him after a<br />short pause, "How did you learn to do this stuff?"<br /> <br />"By holding the flashlight," 
he replied.<br />________________________________________________<br />"Little Johnny's Papa Works"<br /> <br />Little Johnny was talking to a couple of boys in<br />the school yard. Each was bragging about how<br />great their fathers are.<br /> <br />The first one said: "Well, my father runs the fastest.<br />He can fire an arrow, and start to run, I tell you, he<br />gets there before the arrow!"<br /> <br />The second one said: "Ha! You think that's fast!<br />My father is a hunter. He can shoot his gun and<br />be there before the bullet!"<br /> <br />Little Johnny listened to the other two boys and<br />shook his head. He then said: "Sorry, dudes...<br />but MY DAD is the fastest. He's a civil servant.<br />He stops working at 4:30,... and he's home by<br />3:45!"
he replied.<br />________________________________________________<br />"Little Johnny's Papa Works"<br /> <br />Little Johnny was talking to a couple of boys in<br />the school yard. Each was bragging about how<br />great their fathers are.<br /> <br />The first one said: "Well, my father runs the fastest.<br />He can fire an arrow, and start to run, I tell you, he<br />gets there before the arrow!"<br /> <br />The second one said: "Ha! You think that's fast!<br />My father is a hunter. He can shoot his gun and<br />be there before the bullet!"<br /> <br />Little Johnny listened to the other two boys and<br />shook his head. He then said: "Sorry, dudes...<br />but MY DAD is the fastest. He's a civil servant.<br />He stops working at 4:30,... and he's home by<br />3:45!"