A man decides to have a face-lift for his birthday. He spends $5,000<br />and<br />> > feels really good about the results. On his way home, he stops at a<br />> > newsstand and buys a paper.<br />> ><br />> > Before leaving, he says to the sales clerk, "I hope you don't mind me<br />> > asking, but how old do you think I am?"<br />> ><br />> > "About 35," was the reply.<br />> ><br />> > "I'm actually 47," the man says, feeling really happy.<br />> ><br />> > After that, he goes into McDonalds for lunch and asks the clerk the<br />same<br />> > question.<br />> ><br />> > The reply is, "Oh, you look about 29".<br />> ><br />> > "I am actually 47."<br />> ><br />> > Later, while standing at a bus stop, he asks an old woman the same<br />> question.<br />> ><br />> > She replies, "I am 85 years old, and my eyesight is going. But when I<br />was<br />> > young, there was a sure way of telling a man's age. If I put my hand<br />down<br />> > your pants and play with your balls for 10 minutes, I will be able to<br />tell<br />> > you your exact age."<br />> ><br />> > As there was no one around, the man thinks, What the hell and lets her<br />> slip<br />> > her hand down his pants.<br />> ><br />> > Ten minutes later, the old lady says, "Okay, it's done. You are 47."<br />> ><br />> > Stunned, the man says, "That was brilliant. How did you do that?"<br />> ><br />> > The old lady replies, "I was behind you at McDonalds."<br /> 