SpinnerBait_Nut
Honorary Moderator Emeritus
- Joined
- Aug 25, 2002
- Messages
- 17,651
THE YEAR'S BEST[actual] HEADLINES OF 2004:<br /><br /> <br /><br />Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says <br /><br />[no, really?] <br /><br /> <br /><br />Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers <br /><br />[now that's taking things a bit far!] <br /><br /> <br /><br />Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus? <br /><br />[no comment!] <br /><br /> <br /><br />Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over <br /><br />[what a guy!] <br /><br /> <br /><br />Miners Refuse to Work after Death <br /><br />[nooooo-good-for-nothin' lazy so-and-sos!] <br /><br /> <br /><br />Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant <br /><br />[see if that works any better than a fair trial!] <br /><br /> <br /><br />War Dims Hope for Peace <br /><br />[I can see where it might have that effect!] <br /><br /> <br /><br />If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile <br /><br />[you think?!] <br /><br /> <br /><br />Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures <br /><br />[who would have thought!] <br /><br /> <br /><br />Enfield (London) Couple Slain; <br /><br />Police Suspect Homicide <br /><br />[they may be on to something!] <br /><br /> <br /><br />Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges <br /><br />[you mean there's something stronger than duct tape?!] <br /><br /> <br /><br />Man Struck By Lightning Faces Battery Charge <br /><br />[he probably IS the battery charge!] <br /><br /> <br /><br />New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group <br /><br />[weren't they fat enough?!] <br /><br /> <br /><br />Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft <br /><br />[That's what he gets for eating those beans!] <br /><br /> <br /><br />Kids Make Nutritious Snacks <br /><br />[Taste like chicken?] <br /><br /> <br /><br />Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half <br /><br />[Chainsaw Massacre all over again!] <br /><br /> <br /><br />Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors <br /><br />[Boy, are they tall!] <br /><br /> <br /><br />And the winner is....<br /><br /> <br /><br />Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery;<br /><br />Hundreds Dead
