Good Ole Country Wisdom

[LadyFish]

1. Country fences need to be horse high, pig tight, and bull strong.<br /><br />2, Life is not about how fast you run, or how high you climb, but how well you bounce.<br /><br />3. Keep skunks and lawyers at a distance.<br /><br />4. Life is simpler when you plow around the stumps.<br /><br />5. A bumblebee is faster than a John Deere tractor.<br /><br />6. Trouble with a milk cow is she won't stay milked.<br /><br />7. Don't skinny dip with snapping turtles.<br /><br />8. Words that soak into your ears are whispered, not yelled.<br /><br />9. Meanness don't happen overnight.<br /><br />10. To know how country folks are doing, look at their barns, not<br />their houses.<br /><br />11. Never lay an angry hand on a kid or an animal, it just ain't helpful.<br /><br />12. Teachers, Moms, and hoot owls sleep with one eye open.<br /><br />13. Forgive your enemies. It messes with their heads.<br /><br />14. Don't sell your mule to buy a plow.<br /><br />15. Two can live as cheap as one, if one don't eat.<br /><br />16. Don't corner something meaner than you.<br /><br />17. You can catch more flies with honey than vinegar, assuming you want to catch flies.<br /><br />18. Man is the only critter who feels the need to label things as flowers or weeds.<br /><br />19. It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.<br /><br />20. Don't go huntin' with a fellow named Chug-A-Lug.<br /><br />21. You can't unsay a cruel thing.<br /><br />22. Every path has some puddles.<br /><br />23. Don't wrestle with pigs: You'll get all muddy and the pigs will love it.<br /><br />24. The best sermons are lived, not preached.<br /><br />25. Most of the stuff people worry about never happens.<br /><br />26. Don't squat with your spurs on.<br /><br />27. The Ten Commandments display was removed from the Alabama Supreme Court building. There was a good reason for the move: You can't post Thou Shalt Not Steal, Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery and Thou Shall Not Lie, in a building full of lawyers and politicians without creating a hostile work environment.<br /><br />

 

[PatPatterson]

Re: Good Ole Country Wisdom

These sound like some of the witticisms my dad used to have. <br />Country wisdom is better than a college degree, sometimes.

 

[Bassy]

Re: Good Ole Country Wisdom

Yep, ol' Grandpappy used some of these. That man sure was a pleasure to be around. That's for the reminder,LF.<br />Bassy

 

[AK_Chappy]

Re: Good Ole Country Wisdom

LF,<br />I love it! I grew up in the country and remember when "common sense" was actually common.<br />You always seem to have good posts and jokes and all that!<br />Keep 'em coming.<br /><br />AK Chappy

 

[Twidget]

Re: Good Ole Country Wisdom

Hope this isnt one that has made the rounds. <br /><br /><br />A farmer in Texas got pulled over by a State Trooper for speeding. The trooper started to lecture the farmer about his speeding, and in general began to throw his weight around to try to make the farmer feel uncomfortable. Finally, the trooper got around to writing out the ticket. <br /><br />As he was doing that, he kept swatting at some flies that were buzzing around his head. The farmer said, "Having some problem with circle flies there, are ya?" The trooper stopped writing the ticket and said, "Well yeah, if that's what they are. I never heard of circle flies." <br /><br />So the farmer says, "Well, circle flies are common on farms. See, they're called circle flies because they're almost always found circling around the back end of a horse." <br /><br />The trooper says, "Oh," and goes back to writing the ticket. Then after a minute, he stops and says, "Are you trying to call me a horse's ***?" <br /><br />The farmer says, "Oh no, officer. I have too much respect for law enforcement and police officers to even think about calling you a horse's ***." <br /><br />The trooper says, "Well that's a good thing," and goes back to writing the ticket. <br /><br />After a long pause, the farmer says, "Hard to fool them flies though."