SpinnerBait_Nut
Honorary Moderator Emeritus
- Joined
- Aug 25, 2002
- Messages
- 17,651
"Octogenarian Golfer"<br /> <br />An octogenarian, who was an avid golfer, moved to a<br />new town and joined the local Country Club. He went<br />to the Club for the first time to play, but he was told<br />there wasn't anyone with whom he could play because<br />everyone was already out on the course. He was pretty<br />insistent that he really wanted to play.<br /> <br />Finally, the Assistant Pro said he would play with him<br />and asked how many strokes he wanted for a bet. The<br />80 year old said, "I really don't need any strokes because<br />I have been playing quite well. The only real problem I<br />have is getting out of sand traps."<br /> <br />And he did play well. Coming to the par four 18th they were<br />all even. The pro had a nice drive and was able to get on<br />the green and 2-putt for a par. The old man had a nice<br />drive, but his approach shot landed in a sand trap next to<br />the green. Playing from the bunker he hit a high ball which<br />landed on the green and rolled into the hole! Birdie, match<br />and all the money!<br /> <br />The Pro walked over to the sand trap where his opponent<br />was still standing in the trap. He looked down and said,<br />"Nice shot, but I thought you said you have a problem getting<br />out of sand traps?"<br /> <br />Replied the octogenarian, <br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />"I do. Would you please give me a hand?"<br />______________________________________________<br />Tired of being a golf widow, a woman took up the game<br />and wound up playing with her husband on a country<br />course one day. He hit his drive way off into the rough,<br />behind a barn. She came over to take a look, surveyed<br />the situation, and suggested that if he opened both<br />barn doors he could hit his ball straight through the<br />barn to the green.<br /> <br />He saw this as an excellent idea, complimented her for<br />her suggestion, then opened the doors and stepped up<br />to the ball. He made a swing and great contact.<br />Unfortunately, the ball was off line, careened off the<br />door frame, hit the wife in the head and killed her.<br /> <br />Years went by, the man finally remarried, and this time<br />found himself a golfer for a wife. Incredibly, the same<br />situation occurs. The man is in the rough behind the<br />same barn. His new wife took a look at his ball and<br />suggested that he could make the green if he opened<br />both barn doors and hit through the barn.<br /> <br />"No way," he says. "I can't do that."<br /> <br />"Why not?" she asks.<br /> <br />"The last time I did that something terrible happened."<br /> <br />"What?" she asked.<br /> <br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />"I got a double bogey."
