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DJ
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Thought I'd repost this. Some seemed to enjoy it before the "Steve" incident.<br /><br /> Subject: Do you hate YOUR job?<br /><br />Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to The X, 103.2 on your FM dial in Ft Wayne, IN, who was sponsoring a 'worst job experience' contest. <br />Needless to say, she won. <br /><br />Hi Sue, <br />Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at<br />work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all. <br />Before I can tell you what happened to<br />me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job. <br />As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wetsuit. This time of year the water is quite<br />cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: we have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of<br />the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose.<br /><br />Now, this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints. What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working,<br />is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wetsuit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi. <br /><br />Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done. <br /><br />In agony I realized what had happened. The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now since I don't <br />have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it.<br />However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate. When I scratched what I <br />thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into my butt. <br /><br />I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with 5 other divers, were all laughing hysterically. <br /><br />Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make 3 agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling 35 minutes before <br />I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression. <br /><br />When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber.<br /> <br />The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't poop for 2 days because my butt hole was swollen shut. <br />So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt. <br /><br />Now repeat to yourself, 'I love my job, I love my job, I love my job..'
Was ready to run out the front door screaming at least three times today and that was before lunch... 
