Re: Customs Clearance
Having worked (and resigned) from Homeland Security I can tell you from experience consistency is something that doesn't exist inside the department.
You will find MANY excellent people working for customs/border patrol and TSA who try to do their job by the book, with courtesy.
But you have to be aware there are also MANY, for lack of a better term, cowboys out there who abuse their positions and go by how they interpret the rules.
Suggestions:
1) Have a VALID US passport for each individual traveling. This is required. While a US citizen cannot be denied entry, they can make it H**L for you and it can hours for what should be 5 minutes. Also, Customs can issue you a one day US Passport, if you don't have yours. Cost is $350 for the one day. Cheaper and easier to have a valid passport.
2) Have a US Coast Guard Voluntary Inspection prior to your trip. If you pass, you get a decal to put in your windshield. This does not promise you won't have an issue but might get across you do try to go by the book yourself.
3) Never argue with an inspector. If you feel (or are being) mistreated by an inspector, calmly ask for a Supervisor. You have the right to talk to a supervisor no matter what the inspector says. The Supervisor is there to make sure things are running right. Explain the problem as you see it. Don't get emotional, just state the facts. You have the right to ask why something is being done and should be given an explanation.
4) Never try to be funny with the inspector. You don't know what type of day he/she has had. You would not believe the insults, jokes, etc these people get. They do appreciate a customer (that is how they refer to inspectees) who works them and treats them as professional.
5) When it comes to inspections, you might have all your purchases together, making it easier for the inspection. And KEEP ALL RECEIPTS. You could need to prove values of your purchases. And don't be overly helpful. If they want to see something, ask if you should get it or tell them where the item(s) is. An example, once when clearing Customs in a car, I was asked if we had any drugs. I started to reach across to the glove compartment for my prescription meds and the inspector put his hand on my shoulder and said "STOP. please get out of the car". When I told him what I was reaching for I was told step out of the car and he would check for himself. Remember, these folks are trying to do their job and get back home alive at night.
6) And if you have a good experience, thank the individual. If you have a poor experience, write down the officer's name and badge number. You can always send a letter to the Port Director (after you get home) explaining what happened and that you wanted to bring it to their attention. A lot of times this will be looked into and it gets fixed.
Sorry this was long winded, but having worked with the traveling public, I know what my staff and I had to put up with.
Enjoy your trip and you probably will have an easy reentry into the US.