BARLOW and The Parrot

[SpinnerBait_Nut]

BARLOW received a parrot for his birthday. This parrot was<br />fully grown with a bad attitude and terrible vocabulary.<br />Every other word was an expletive. Those that weren't<br />expletives were, to say the least, rude.<br /> <br />BARLOW tried hard to change the bird's attitude. He was<br />constantly saying polite words and playing soft music,<br />he did anything he could think of. Nothing worked. When<br />he yelled at the bird, the bird got worse. If he shook the<br />bird, the bird got madder and ruder.<br /> <br />Finally in a moment of desperation, BARLOW put the parrot in<br />the freezer. For a few moments he heard the bird squawking,<br />kicking and screaming and then suddenly, there was quiet.<br />BARLOW was frightened that he might have actually hurt the<br />bird and quickly opened the freezer door.<br /> <br />The parrot calmly stepped out onto BARLOW's extended arm<br />and said: "I'm sorry that I might have offended you with my<br />language and actions, so I ask for your forgiveness. I will<br />endeavor to correct my behavior."<br /> <br />BARLOW was astounded at the bird's change in attitude and<br />was about to ask what had changed him when the parrot<br />continued: <br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />"May I ask what the chicken did?"

 

[PatPatterson]

Re: BARLOW and The Parrot

Oldie, but a goody.

 

[JB]

Re: BARLOW and The Parrot

 

[Stumpys]

Re: BARLOW and The Parrot

So what did the chicken do??? Too funny!

 

[PatPatterson]

Re: BARLOW and The Parrot

A lady was walking down the street to work, and she saw a parrot on a perch in front of a pet store. <br /><br />The parrot said to her, “Hey lady, you are really ugly.” <br /><br />Well, as you can imagine, the lady is furious! She stormed past the store to her work. <br /><br />On the way home she saw the same parrot, and it said to her, “Hey lady, you are really ugly.” She was incredibly ticked now. <br /><br />The next day the same parrot again said to her, “WOW lady, you are still really ugly.” <br /><br />The lady was so ticked that she went into the store and said that she would sue the store and kill the bird if the manager didn’t take care of this problem. <br /><br />The store manager apologized profusely and promised he would make sure the parrot didn’t say it again.<br /> <br />When the lady walked past the store that day after work, the parrot called to her, “Hey lady.” <br /><br />She stopped and said, “Yes?” <br /><br />The bird paused, then said, “You know.”

 

[roscoe]

Re: BARLOW and The Parrot

 

[Barlow]

Re: BARLOW and The Parrot

What? ... What I do?<br /><br />I don't get it... <br /><br />I was out dove hunting yesterday so did I miss something???<br /><br /><br />

 

[jtexas]

Re: BARLOW and The Parrot

May I ask what the dove did?

 

[Barlow]

Re: BARLOW and The Parrot

Was in the wrong place at the wrong time.<br /><br />ohh boy... better get back to the basement and continue loading some Hevi-Shot 20ga loads...<br /><br />Duck season started and I'm a bit low.

 

[Barlow]

Re: BARLOW and The Parrot

oops

 

[WillyBWright]

Re: BARLOW and The Parrot

True story, but not about a parrot.<br /><br />I was working at a marina on the Rock River (well named!) when a duck of questionable parentage (mixed-breed) came waddling up at lunchtime. I expect it wasn't particularly welcome by his pure-bred duck buddies as they fed, so we took pity and threw it a few goodies. He ate his fill and waddled back down the ramp into the water and swam off contented. He came back on and off and one day the manager said "I suppose you have a name for it by now."<br /><br />"Yup. Dinner!"<br /><br />"Why, because he always shows up here when it's time to eat?"<br /><br />"No. That way when he comes waddling up the ramp we can say "Heeeeere comes Dinner.""<br /><br />-<br />-<br />-<br />-<br />-<br /><br />Postscript... One day he just stopped coming. I suppose he waddled up other boat ramps, too.

 

[SS MAYFLOAT]

Re: BARLOW and The Parrot

See there, capital punishment does make some things go from bad to good.

 

[KaGee]

Re: BARLOW and The Parrot

Can think of other things I would prefer to eat, other than duck or dove. A dove is still a pigeon in my book.<br /><br />True Story...<br />I've been going out to Vegas for trade shows now for over 25 years. They used to have dinner shows all over town. No matter what show you went to, the menu was always the same... Prime Rib or Capon. One night at one of these shows several of us were ordering our dinner. One person who was sort of a rookie to Vegas inquired about the Capon. Before the waiter could speak, an associate of mine blurted out... "Ya ever notice the lack of pigeons around here?"

 

[Barlow]

Re: BARLOW and The Parrot

very true KaGee! Funny story too!.. both (unless properly prepared)are not the best table fare by themselves. Very important that with waterfowl (exclude most Diving ducks and mergansers.. yuck!) the blood be retained in the muscle/meat.<br /><br />Breast meat gets ground up with pork trimmings, seasonings, and stuffed into brat cassings and if you add other seasonings suffed into smaller casings to make hot sticks.<br /><br />Most waterfowl/migratory's I harvest get processed this way -or- for larger Ducks and Geese they get cut into 1/4" strips and soaked in brine of jerky seasonings for 48hrs then, set in the dehydrator to make jerky.<br /><br />IMHO it's better than any beef jerky produced and the brats and hot sticks are more healthy and tasty than store bought pork and beef items.<br />---<br />for those who don't know...<br />A Capon is actually a castrated rooster (chicken). They do that to increase growth and table worth... its a hormone thing.<br /><br />now....if I can just catch that silly Parrot..