autism

[cgd7777777]

what we have suspected for a while was diagnosted today. My 3 year boy has autism. It is glad to finally know for sure and we can learn how to better deal with him and get the help he needs.
he barely speaks any understandable words but understands everything you say. He has no interest in other kids and an obsession with any kind of wheels boats and tractors and a few other social problems.
but he is my best little helper he will stick with me all day long no matter what I am doing....even working on the sewer in the dark last week! He can even drive a truck sitting on my lap better than my 6 yr old girl can and he can cook his own corndog!
bubba has already been a test on our petients, which I have failed many times but I am hoping knowing why he is behavaving theway he does I can better handle some of the situatins.

if any of yall have or had a boy like this feel free to share your experiences with me this is very new to us. We are nervous and worried about when he grows up

 

[wlg]

Re: autism

I have never had to deal with anything like this myself. I do wonder about one of my grand kids. My wife drives a school van and some of the children have different disabilities including autism. She tells me stories, almost always amusing. They are like her own kids. I'm sure everything will work out fine. I wish you and your family all the best.

 

[Bob_VT]

Re: autism

I have a nephew who is 10 that was diagnosed at an early age. There are tremendous support groups and networks that help. Seek out information local to you and you will find you are far from being alone in that situation.

 

[CaptainKickback]

Re: autism

Cgd, sorry to hear. I have a 33 year old daughter (34 tomorrow) who is a highly functioning autistic. Actually diagnosed after childhood. You will find your son has certain things he will be able to do extremely well. Cultivating those thing will be a joy for you and him. My daughter travels all over the world, by herself, doing mission work at orphanages. In fact, she leaves next Monday for South Africa for a 10 week mission trip.

Sounds like you son is your best buddy. Stick with him.

 

[Jeep Man]

Re: autism

Wife has a lot more experience with autism than I do. She works with autistic kids every day and has taken several courses. No clear cut reason why it afflicks some kids, and then there are so many variations of the disorder. PM me if you have questions and I'll have wifey reply.

 

[sublauxation]

Re: autism

My youngest son hasn't been officially diagnosed but he's one one side or the other of the higher functioning edge of the spectrum. In a way you can look at it as gift because although they'll make you want to pull out your hair, they find such extreme joy in other things. like your son, mine is into boats and anything with wheels which is obviously great, and it becomes a great bargaining chip at times. There are some great programs out there and the teachers in them seem to be drawn there because they have a natural gift for dealing with autism. That's a gift I'm working on as patience is the key, and it's something I lack. I plan extra time for everything now, especially transitions to different activities and when leaving the house. We praise him for everything and anything good that he does. One thing we have to constantly remind ourselves is to do the same for our other kids as they get frustrated by not getting that same amount of attention all the time.

My mom is a nanny and she has that gift. I've met most of the kids she's worked with and the change can be incredible over time. My son had a great preschool program and now in Kindergarden he sees a special ed teacher about half an hour per day. They've helped a lot and most days my son does really well to a point where he's getting pushed further out on that spectrum. I think you're right that knowing the cause helps. The frustration doesn't go away but we're noticing more good days than bad now. I wish you the best and hope you see those same results.

 

[JB]

Re: autism

Grandson Christopher was diagnosed as autistic which was later revised to Asberger's Syndrome, one of the "higher functioning" varieties. As I understand it, all autistics struggle with parts of what we think of as "normal" dealings with life. . .most commonly social interaction. . . but are amazingly skilled at others.

With Chris, it is predictability that separates his struggles from his genius. People are a mystery but numbers and puzzles are a snap.

He is in his mid 20s and expects to finish his degree this year. He can audit a ledger or debug software in seconds but doesn't understand why people are so "uptight" about personal grooming and hygiene.

Knowing Chris is an enriching education in understanding why we are the way we are.

 

[halfmoa]

Re: autism

My son has Aspergers Syndrome and I honestly believe I do too. My wife works for a program through our state board of education that helps families with autistic children get their lives in order, find help, and make contacts within their local community.

The best advice I can give you (aside of unconditional love etc) is this: Don't let autism define who your son is, let him define what it means to him. By that I mean let him embrace his love of boats, tractors, or vehicles and run with it. It cannot become his whole world but you need to nurture the obsession. Look up Dr. Temple Grandin's videos and her life work. That right there is someone who had their obsession nurtured and is better for it.

The second piece of advice is a bit more complicated: Don't let your son's diagnosis define who you are, either. With the local support we have here (which is little to none aside of what some parents have done) it's easy for every gathering, most of your friends, and the majority of your life to revolve around autism. I know my situation is different because of my wife's job but I know there's a lot of parents we associate with that don't seem to have any life whatsoever outside of their child's diagnosis. The longer you're around these kids and their families you'll see it too.

 

[southkogs]

Re: autism

No one in my family with Aspergers or Autism, but I have several friends who have children that have been diagnosed at different stages. There are several different approaches to dealing with it, but as an encouragement most of the families I know have learned to function with it very well. One of the boys is in the process of getting his pilot's license.

One particular family has essentially come through the other side using an alternative approach. Her son was completely disconnected, and didn't communicate well ... a head banger, if you want the crass definition. If you're interested in what they've done send me a PM, and I'll be glad to get you details.

 

[cgd7777777]

Re: autism

thank you fellas for the replies!
3 weeks ago my wife got a job so he has been going to a day care and last week we took him to a new place with a pre school and a lot more structure and to our surprise he likes it! Even though she is just working to pay for school I think it is worth it…not only for him but for her... She is enjoying getting to interact with adults
next school year he will get to go to the school's pre-k

it was really nice hearing a few success stories, I have shared every post with my wife and she has enjoyed it
she has been reading stuff on the internet and ends up balling her eyes out sometimes...

 

[ajgraz]

Re: autism

I do have an autistic nephew. As if that wasn't bad enough, his mother was an alcoholic and meth addict and no one even knows who his father was. He's 18 now, with a lot of help from family and therapy through the years, he's turned out to be the nicest kid I know. He just started community college.

Varies from state to state, but having the official diagnosis should open the door to more assistance options.

 

[RojoSnapper]

Re: autism

cdg, looks like you have some great advice on this thread. I just wanted to say, God bless your son and your family.

 

[cgd7777777]

Re: autism

Its amazing why and where we end up in this world! everything happens for a reason
a few months back we started going to church and my wife made a friend that her son has autism, my wife is now working with her!
at the doughnut shop this morning i ran into the lady that owns the preschool that we are sending Bubba to. She was telling me how he is actually interacting with a few of the kids now! He raises his hand and will actually eat with the other kids in the kitchen!!
Its nice to hear good news on a rainy Friday morning!