heycods
Captain
- Joined
- Nov 11, 2005
- Messages
- 3,941
> A priest, a Pentecostal preacher and a Rabbi all served as chaplains <br />to<br />> the students of Northern Michigan University in Marquette.<br />><br />><br />> They would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to <br />talk<br />> shop. One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people <br />isn't<br />> really all that hard. A real challenge would be to preach to a bear.<br />> One thing led to another and they decided to do an experiment They <br />would<br />> all<br />> go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to <br />convert<br />> it.<br />> Seven days later, they're all together to discuss the experience.<br />><br />><br />> Father Flannery, who has his arm in a sling, is on crutches, and has <br />> various<br />> bandages, goes first. "Well," he says, "I went into the woods to find <br />me<br />> bear.<br />> And when I found him I began to read to him from the Catechism. Well,<br />> that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me around. <br />So I<br />> quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary Mother of<br />> God, he became as gentle a lamb. The bishop is coming out next week <br />to <br />> give<br />> him first communion and confirmation."<br />><br />><br />> Reverend Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, with an arm <br />and<br />> both legs in casts, and an IV drip. In his best fire and brimstone <br />oratory<br />> he<br />> claimed, " WELL brothers, you KNOW that we don't sprinkle! I went out<br />> and I FOUND me a bear. And then I began to read to my bear from God's<br />> HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted nothing to do with me. So I took<br />> HOLD of him and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP<br />> another and DOWN another until we came to a creek. So I quick DUNKED<br />> him and BAPTIZED his hairy soul. And just like you said, he became as <br />> gentle<br />> as a lamb. We spent the rest of the praising Jesus."<br />><br />><br />> They both looked down at the rabbi, who was lying in a hospital bed. <br />He<br />> was in a body cast and traction with IV's and monitors running in and <br />out<br />> of<br />> him. He was in bad shape.<br />><br />><br />> The rabbi looks up and says, "Looking back on it, circumcision may <br />not<br />> have been the best way to start."<br />>
still LMAO though!