LadyFish
Admiral
- Joined
- Mar 18, 2003
- Messages
- 6,894
If Abbot and Costello would do something like thier "Who's on First" bit today...it may be something like this:<br /><br />Abbott & Costello in the 21st Century<br /><br />ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?<br />COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den, and I'm thinking about buying a computer.<br />ABBOTT: Mac?<br />COSTELLO: No, the names Lou.<br />ABBOTT: Your computer?<br />COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.<br />ABBOTT: Mac?<br />COSTELLO: I told you, my names Lou.<br />ABBOTT: What about Windows?<br />COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?<br />ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?<br />COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look in the windows?<br />ABBOTT: Wallpaper.<br />COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.<br />ABBOTT: Software for Windows?<br />COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What have you got?<br />ABBOTT: Office.<br />COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?<br />ABBOTT: I just did!<br />COSTELLO: You just did what?<br />ABBOTT: Recommend something.<br />COSTELLO: You recommended something?<br />ABBOTT: Yes.<br />COSTELLO: For my office?<br />ABBOTT: Yes<br />COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?<br />ABBOTT: Office.<br />COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!<br />ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.<br />COSTELLO: I already have an office and it has windows! OK, lets just say, I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?<br />ABBOTT: Word.<br />COSTELLO: What word?<br />ABBOTT: Word in Office.<br />COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.<br />ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.<br />COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?<br />ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue W.<br />COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue w if you don't start with some straight answers. OK, forget that. Can I watch movies on the Internet?<br />ABBOTT: Yes, you want RealOne.<br />COSTELLO: Maybe a real one, maybe a cartoon. What I watch is none of your business. Just tell me what I need!<br />ABBOTT: RealOne.<br />COSTELLO: If its a long movie I also want to see reel 2, 3 & 4. Can I watch them?<br />ABBOTT: Of course.<br />COSTELLO: Great, with what?<br />ABBOTT: RealOne.<br />COSTELLO; OK, I'm at my computer and I want to watch a movie. What do I do?<br />ABBOTT: You click the blue 1.<br />COSTELLO: I click the blue one what?<br />ABBOTT: The blue 1.<br />COSTELLO: Is that different from the blue W?<br />ABBOTT: The blue 1 is RealOne and the blue W is Word.<br />COSTELLO: What word?<br />ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.<br />COSTELLO: But there's three words in office for windows!<br />ABBOTT: No, just one. But its the most popular Word in the world.<br />COSTELLO: It is?<br />ABBOTT: Yes, but to be fair, there aren't many other Words left. It pretty much wiped out all the other Words out there.<br />COSTELLO: And that word is the real one?<br />ABBOTT: RealOne has nothing to do with Word. RealOne isn't even part of Office.<br />COSTELLO: Stop! Don't start that again. What about financial bookkeeping, do you have anything I can track my money with?<br />ABBOTT: Money.<br />COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?<br />ABBOTT: Money.<br />COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?<br />ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.<br />COSTELLO: What's bundled to my computer?<br />ABBOTT: Money.<br />COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?<br />ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.<br />COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?<br />ABBOTT: One copy.<br />COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money?<br />ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.<br />COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?<br />ABBOTT: Why not, they own it.
