Dave Abrahamson
Lieutenant
- Joined
- May 8, 2003
- Messages
- 1,497
You will never hear a fisherman say:<br /><br />1. Could you bait my hook for me? Worms give me the willies. <br />2. Sorry buddy, Im going to have to cancel our fishing trip this weekend. I just found out Sears is having an awesome White Sale.<br />3. Hey, Ive got an idea, instead of our annual fishing trip to Canada, lets go to a dude ranch just like in the movie City Slickers.<br />4. Where did we catch all these fish? Here, let me show you on the map. <br />5. I know were lifelong buddies and all, but that last joke you told was really politically incorrect. <br />6. What do you say we take a break from fishing and work on our tans?<br />7. Man, I would really love to buy this rod and reel, but I noticed my curtains at home are going to need replacing.<br />8. I cant wait to get back in, its almost beer-30.<br />9. I love how youve accessorized your outfit by matching the lure color with your rod, reel, and hat. <br />10. Have you ever stopped to think how many chores we could get done at home if we didnt fish so much? <br />11. Dont worry about chipping in for gas, bait, and all my beer youve been drinking, just having you along every weekend is payment enough.<br />12. Pay $50 for a fishing rod? ... I dont think so.<br />13. When we reel in a fish, do you think it suffers from separation anxiety when its removed from the school?<br />14. I love having those jet bikes buzzing us so close, the spray is so refreshing. <br />15. Dont worry about actually paying me that $5 bet for the first one to catch a fish.<br />16. You remember when I told you it doesnt matter to me if I catch fish or not, its just being out here on the water thats important? ... I was telling the truth.<br />17. Ive been thinking of selling my boat and taking up gardening instead. <br />18. You know what my favorite part of fishing is? Its cleaning up the boat afterwards.<br />19. Can you imagine how awful it would be to fish on the pro tour; I mean, what would you do for fun on your days off?<br />20. You know, it just occurred to me that if we went to the supermarket and just bought our fish, we wouldnt have to waste so much time out here trying to catch dinner. <br />21. Man, I cant wait to tell the gang down at the bait shop about that new hot spot we found.<br />22. I wish we didnt have all this fuel on board. <br />23. Ive never admitted this to anyone else, but I think the reason I catch more fish than anyone on this lake is due to plain old dumb luck.<br />24. Wow, have you ever read the label on these canned weenies; I cant believe how much fat and sodium are in these things. <br />25. Honey, even though your mom and I dont get along very well, do you think she might want to go fishing sometime?<br />26. I dont know why anyone needs a boat that goes faster than 30 mph.<br />27. For lunch, I brought us watercress sandwiches, vichyssoise, and some ice cold Perrier to wash it down.<br />28. You know, even though the folks who make the fishing rules and regulations have never been fishing in their entire lives, I think theyre doing a great job.
