Women

bowman316 · Mar 30, 2009

So my GF just told me that she would rather Go out and have fun with her friends without me, instead of being with me. She just always seemed to have plans with her friends, and I would never see her. I guess if she wants that, I don't want her anyway.

She is 23, so i guess she still has that party bug, But I am a year younger and would not mind settling down, as far as not going out to the bar every night. I guess she is just not the one for me.

boat1010 · Mar 30, 2009

Re: Women

I guess it is best to find this out now when she is a "GF" and not your wife. Don't lose faith. There are lots of great women out there, ya just need to take your time and get to know them first. Hang in there.

scipper77 · Mar 30, 2009

Re: Women

People change through there 20's and get divorced through there 30's. You don't want to end up a cliche anyways.

JB · Mar 30, 2009

Re: Women

Good thinking, there, young fella.

57whitehouse · Mar 30, 2009

Re: Women

funny how that works. I've been married for 7 years now and I encourage my wife to go out with the girls. I'll watch the kids. But they don't go bar-hopping. They do coffee and cheesecake.

bowman316 · Mar 30, 2009

Re: Women

yea, she said she didn't want to change cuz of me, and not hang out with her friends as much, like what her roomate did when she got a bf. She said her friends are imporntant to her, apparently more so than me.

81 beachcomber · Mar 30, 2009

Re: Women

bowman316 said:
yea, she said she didn't want to change cuz of me, and not hang out with her friends as much, like what her roommate did when she got a bf. She said her friends are imporntant to her, apparently more so than me.

ya i dont think thats quite right. By all means she should be able to go out with her friends and have a good time, but they should definetly not be more important than you, if she wants a relationship shes gotta make changes and make time for you as well. my opinion anyways.

Laddies · Mar 30, 2009

Re: Women

I think you will be kissing a lot of trouble good by. I had a good friend go through it with his wife and after 15 years of marriage she told him don't worry about the kids I don't think their your anyway. It just about killed him.

kenmyfam · Mar 30, 2009

Re: Women

Get out now before it is to late and expensive. You will find the right one for you.

ebry710 · Mar 31, 2009

Re: Women

bowman316 said:
yea, she said she didn't want to change cuz of me, and not hang out with her friends as much, like what her roommate did when she got a bf. She said her friends are imporntant to her, apparently more so than me.

I always look at a relationship with an eliminate of mutual change. To refuse to change on the "get go" means that the other person must do all the changing. That person might at first do all the changing, but later on resentment will take over.

tashasdaddy · Mar 31, 2009

Re: Women

RUN. RUN fast, take her # out of you cell phone, block the #. get on with your life. i had on that was always going out with "friends" never a name, just "friends". did not take long to figure that out. if she does not want to make you part of here circle, get rid of her NOW.

Edko · Mar 31, 2009

Re: Women

Bowman, "drop it like it's hot"...

nlain · Mar 31, 2009

Re: Women

There are more out there and some that will be in the boat anytime you are, don't care about doing anything special just out in the boat. Mine wishes I had to boat in the water more than I do, we can just go for a ride, go drop anchor and claim to be fishing, go to the beach out on the barrier islands. Just keep looking you will find someone that will enjoy most of the things you do.

bowman316 · Mar 31, 2009

Re: Women

Yea, she said usually her bf does his own thing with his friends, and she the same.
I might be friends w/ bennefits with her eventually. I have already given up a serious relationship with her, we did not have a lot in common anyway.

SS MAYFLOAT · Mar 31, 2009

Re: Women

There is plenty to fish to catch, you got to catch one that won't change you or themselves. Giving up stuff and changing things to be with someone is not being yourself and most importantly not fair to the other.

What is said about relationships/divorces is true with 20/30 year olds. I got married twice in my 20's, once in my 30's, and the final time in my 40's. Been married for almost 12 years now to this keeper. We see eye to eye on everything and have the same interests as well........So I know it is possible to find the right one! Momma told me that lonnnnng time ago, only took me over 30 years to understand what she meant

mike64 · Mar 31, 2009

Re: Women

Be careful about doing the friends with benefits thing. If you can be clearheaded about the limits of that, it might work out ok. But if you still have strong feelings for her, it's just going to mess with your head and prolong your finding a girl you're more compatible with. Sounds like you want something more serious, so maybe a clean break is best.

since this is a boating forum, gotta say it-- there's more fish in the sea buddy

Wotknot · Mar 31, 2009

Re: Women

Before I got married I told my wife-to-be that I wanted 1 boys-nite-out per week. Now almost 32 years later I figure I've got around 1,525 that I have yet to use. It helps when your spouse is your best friend. Hang in there, when the right one comes along, you'll know.

avenger79 · Mar 31, 2009

Re: Women

I had a girl tell me that once, I took her being out with friends as an opportunity to clear my things out and never looked back. Don't regret it a bit either.
a night out with friends now and then is fine but when she puts you on hold for them then you know where you stand.
Lots of fish out there. Wait for a real keeper to come along not one you have to convince yourself why you want her around.

180shabah · Mar 31, 2009

Re: Women

avenger79 said:
....Wait for a real keeper to come along not one you have to convince yourself why you want her around.

Best advice I've heard.

Tell her you need a woman, not a girl. Move on, but keep your eyes open, that woman probably won't won't be wearing bells and flashing lights. She'll just show up, and if you don't grab her, you'll miss her.

Good luck, and remember, the best place to find women who enjoy boats, is in the water. Go have a good time, and don't sweat the relationship thing.

bowman316 · Mar 31, 2009

Re: Women

yea, and i may not want a commited relationship with summer comming up, So i may just want to see her more infrequently.
I guess she was trying to get the relationship more casual for a while, and i was trying to go the other way.

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