The greatest fear a man can have.

Tyme2fish

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[h=2]The greatest fear a man can have.[/h]
Neighbors to the north and south of me are planning on having a "yard sale" while I am away on a fishing trip. Why does that scare or concern me? Because Mrs.Tyme has decided that after 34 years of being together that it's time she had a yard sale. The inaugural yard sale of our marriage.

Over the years we have donated clothing,furniture,tools,etc to local charities and I have no problem with that arrangement.

We've got junk,excuse me, I meant to say valuable goods and ancient artifacts, in the attic,basement,closets,garage,and every room in the house.

I've observed some of these valuable goods being gathered in our living room. One item was a glass pitcher that has been in my possession for 10,000 years. I came to be the owner of that pitcher after an evening at Pizza Hut in my college days after consuming a near lethal dose of beer that night. I almost suffered a cardiac arrest when espying my sacred trophy up for sale to the lowly public. It's also a perfect pitcher for making Kool-aid.

In a futile attempt at self preservation, I've decided that I am required to lock the boat barn doors upon my departure to prevent any encroachment into my testosterone laden "inner sanctum".
The "boat barn" houses all my rods,reels,boat, boat parts,anchors,lures and tackle that I've strenuously and painstakingly accumulated over my life time and the lifetime of my father.

She then has the utter audacity to ask me for some money to host the sale. What? I need to give her money so she can sell my stuff? I think she's referring to the "cash till" to give change to the buying public. I just told her,"Mark the items at an even dollar amount. If the item is $1.00 and they only have a $5.00, well tough for them. Tell them to pick out 4 more $1.00 items or increase the price of the item they want to the $5.00 they have." I worked retail all my life and have no use for any of you "public people" LOL

I'm worried friends. I'm scared. Alas, what can I do?
 

bassman284

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Re: The greatest fear a man can have.

Hmm. Lures and tackle, eh? I'll be right over.
 

GA_Boater

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Re: The greatest fear a man can have.

Ohoh. If you're out fishing and fishing gear is still at home, obviously it's unneeded stuff. Therefore, excess inventory to be sold. :eek: A woman's mind can be devious. :) Fat chance she will give the "profits" from selling your gear. :faint2:
 

emilsr

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Re: The greatest fear a man can have.

Lock up the important stuff (your liquor cabinet and fishing tackle) and let her get rid of the rest of it. She's doing you a favor. There's only a couple of important things in life and old trinkets don't fall into that category.
 

southkogs

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Re: The greatest fear a man can have.

Quickly - get $100 cash. Raid her sewing room for a few yards of colored yarn. Run to Wally World for some hooks. Check the local CL for a few junk anchors.

Use, the $100 to buy the junk anchors and the hooks. Save residual change for the Admiral for her change till. Take her yarn and tie different shapes around the hooks from Wally World to look like old fishing lures (let soak overnight and dry for 24 hours for added realism).

Deliver old anchors, "yarn-made" lures and change to the Admiral and say you dug all this "junk" outta' the boat barn and she can sell it at the yard sale, and "oh, here's some cash for the change till."

Played quickly, and well - you may just thwart an invasion of your stash. Good luck.
 

Tyme2fish

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Re: The greatest fear a man can have.

I'm locking the barn door before the horse (boat) gets out and hiding the key.
 

tomdinwv

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Re: The greatest fear a man can have.

Here's what you do. Go around your house and quietly gather her favorite items. Take them out to your "inner sanctum" and put the afore mentioned $.50 price tags on each item. Before you leave home the day of the yard sale, ask Mrs. Tyme to go out to your "inner sanctum" and show her your new "collection". Simply tell her if any of your valuable treasures (you and I know all your "man possesions" are valuable) you will be having a yard sale upon your return. Although some may consider this "blackmail" or "extortion" try using the pharse"coming to an understanding". It's the foundation of all healthy relationships.
 

colbyt

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Re: The greatest fear a man can have.

Neighbors to the north and south of me are planning on having a "yard sale" while I am away on a fishing trip. Why does that scare or concern me? Because Mrs.Tyme has decided that after 34 years of being together that it's time she had a yard sale. The inaugural yard sale of our marriage.

My friend, this is serious business. You have 2 choices:
Follow the Civil Defense drills of the 50's; get under your desk and kiss it goodbye.
or
Tell her is it one for one of her treasures. For most women that should be 2 of hers for one of yours.


Either way, I highly suspect you would be better off and happier if you stayed at home.
 

Tyme2fish

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Re: The greatest fear a man can have.

Either way, I highly suspect you would be better off and happier if you stayed at home.


Maybe better off but definitely not happier.:lol:

After 34 years, I trust my wife. None of the knick knacks and such that she has displayed so far are of any concern to me. The garage is full of assorted tools and she knows that's a hands off area for sale items as is my locked boat barn.

Too late for me to cancel the trip. I just finished packing my clothes and now it's off to the shower and bed time.

I'll post to y'all once I return. Hold down the fort for me.:)
 

Jeep Man

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Re: The greatest fear a man can have.

Think I saw this episode on Duck Dynasty.
 

rivermouse

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Re: The greatest fear a man can have.

We had one yard sale 20 years ago. It was our first and our last.....No way will I ever let those people on my property again....
 

aspeck

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Re: The greatest fear a man can have.

My wife wanted to do the yards sale thing ... 2 days of digging stuff out, a hot day of people coming by to handle our junk and put it back, and about $75 later ... She decided they were not worth it. I didn't try to talk her out of that. Give,our stuff away instead of selling ... Works much better and much easier that way!
 

catfish58

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Re: The greatest fear a man can have.

Well, at least you'll have room for more 'stuff'. :lol:
 

blackhawk180

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Re: The greatest fear a man can have.

We had one yard sale 20 years ago. It was our first and our last.....No way will I ever let those people on my property again....
+100
Horrible experience. I'd rather PAY someone to come take the stuff than have "those people" on my property again. Double lock your boat barn and consider setting up a game cam to see who actually tries to open it anyway. Cover the windows too. Seriously. Some of these yard sales are an excuse for evil doers to come case your place for future evil activity.
But try to forget about it and have fun fishing. Man after my own heart.
 

littlerayray

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Re: The greatest fear a man can have.

my wife doesnt do the yard sale thing
she sells stuff online the most frustrating part when i go looking for something and it is not their and then after two too three days of looking i ask her and she sold it
 

littlerayray

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Re: The greatest fear a man can have.

last time she did that i got so mad i scared the living bejesus out of her and she hasnt done it in a while
 

littlerayray

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Re: The greatest fear a man can have.

and she knows better then to touch my tools
 

DECK SWABBER 58

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Re: The greatest fear a man can have.

The only solution is to postpone that fishing trip. STAY HOME AND PROTECT YOUR STUFF.:faint2:
 

Tyme2fish

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Re: The greatest fear a man can have.

I'm sure glad I wasn't present at this sale event. Mrs.Tyme told me it was a 2 day sale and people were giving her offers on my tillers, mowers,and even my 2004 F-150 parked in it's spot!!

As far as I can tell, all my stuff is still here but I have yet to take an accurate inventory. I almost fainted when I went to the boat barn and saw the door ajar. "I'm coming to see ya,Elizabeth"!! Mrs.Tyme had just opened it for me as I had called her from the road and informed her as to my E.T.A.

She did make some money but asked me not to post the amount.
 
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