Women and babies: The birthing process

Tyme2fish · Jul 8, 2009

My niece from my wife's side of the family is in the hospital in labor as I type . The parents already know the gender of the child and have the name picked out. This is their first.

My complaint: The phone is ringing constantly imforming my wife of how many centimeters she's dilated, she just received the saddle block, etc ad nauseum.

I just told the wife, "Excuse me. You have mistaken me for someone who cares. Just inform me of when the baby is actually born. I don't even care how long or what weight. Until then, you may leave me out of this information loop."

The grandmother,my wife and all the old hens are clucking and pecking and driving me crazy.

I think I'll go out to the boat barn and drink beer till this baby arrives in the world.

PS. It didn't help my cause when I told the father-to-be to hold the baby up by the bottom lip to judge it's weight.

angus63 · Jul 8, 2009

Re: Women and babies: The birthing process

Tyme2drink????? Now!!!!
I'd offer congrats but that is just more premature jubilation

(congrats)

jakebrake · Jul 8, 2009

Re: Women and babies: The birthing process

hey regardless of weight, it's a keeper!

we're guys. we don't totally get it. we never will i think.

i think we're lucky

Thad · Jul 8, 2009

Re: Women and babies: The birthing process

I'm with you!

I don't care how far along, how dialated, what drugs...

Just tell me when I get the cigar and the brandy! I'll celebrate the BIRTH with ya, not the process.

Drink one for me, I'm still at work

Tyme2fish · Jul 8, 2009

Re: Women and babies: The birthing process

Well, the hens are cackling and strutting and vocalizing like roosters.

The baby has arrived.

I was only in the boat barn for a three beer tour. (I drink slowly.)

angus63 · Jul 8, 2009

Re: Women and babies: The birthing process

Tyme2fish said:
Well, the hens are cackling and strutting and vocalizing like roosters.

The baby has arrived.

I was only in the boat barn for a three beer tour.

Good for you!!!

jay_merrill · Jul 8, 2009

Re: Women and babies: The birthing process

Tyme2fish said:
I think I'll go out to the boat barn and drink beer till this baby arrives in the world.

Now, if you had just done that in the first place ....

kenmyfam · Jul 8, 2009

Re: Women and babies: The birthing process

I;m all for the beer drinking thing. Great idea !!!

Andy in NY · Jul 9, 2009

Re: Women and babies: The birthing process

women always need to know every little detail about a birth. everytime someone we know has a baby and I talk to them first, my wife asks what time they were born, how long, weight, etc. im like, i dunno, its a kid. 10 toes, 10 fingers...

BoatBuoy · Jul 9, 2009

Re: Women and babies: The birthing process

T2F, I absolutely know what you're talking about. My daughter is due in a couple of weeks and the clucking and pecking is at a fervid level.

I don't drink, but I am spending more time at the range.

gonefishie · Jul 9, 2009

Re: Women and babies: The birthing process

Tyme2fish said:
PS. It didn't help my cause when I told the father-to-be to hold the baby up by the bottom lip to judge it's weight

You didn't forget to tell him to make sure he pinch the lips together and the feet together to get an accurate length measurement didn't you?

jay_merrill · Jul 9, 2009

Re: Women and babies: The birthing process

gonefishie said:
You didn't forget to tell him to make sure he pinch the lips together and the feet together to get an accurate length measurement didn't you?

What do you do if the kid is undersized?

Tyme2fish · Jul 9, 2009

Re: Women and babies: The birthing process

jay_merrill said:
What do you do if the kid is undersized?

I think babies fall under the "slot" limit regulations.

aspeck · Jul 9, 2009

Re: Women and babies: The birthing process

jay_merrill said:
What do you do if the kid is undersized?

Oh come on, you know you have to throw them back and let them grow to the predetermined length before you can keep them!

mtbdudex · Jul 9, 2009

Re: Women and babies: The birthing process

what?
They are not using Facebook or "tweeting" the twitter thingy details?

Real phone conversations are so ......pre 2007's

At least they are not posting real time YouTubes via iPhone!

j_martin · Jul 9, 2009

Re: Women and babies: The birthing process

WE had most of ours (9) at home. They came so fast and hard there was no time for chit chat or telephone updates. Usually it was an hour or so for things to settle down enough for a call to be made.

I have been accused of delivering my babies. I didn't deliver, ma did that. I just caught.

My 02
John

LadyFish · Jul 9, 2009

Re: Women and babies: The birthing process

Until one of you men actually give birth, you will never understand the importance of those details and the dicsussion that ensues before during and after child birth.

Just be supportive and tune out the details.

JB · Jul 13, 2009

Re: Women and babies: The birthing process

Births, like weddings, are a girl thing.

If we want guy things respected we must respect girl things.

slia67 · Jul 13, 2009

Re: Women and babies: The birthing process

JB said:
If we want guy things respected we must respect girl things.

Great quote, JB!!!

LadyFish · Jul 14, 2009

Re: Women and babies: The birthing process

JB said:
Births, like weddings, are a girl thing.

If we want guy things respected we must respect girl things.

I love it, mind if I steal it. hehehehehe

Women and babies: The birthing process

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