dolluper
Captain
- Joined
- Jul 19, 2004
- Messages
- 3,900
This is the actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support<br /> employee (now I know why they record these conversations)<br /><br /> "Rich Hall computer assistance; may I help you?"<br /> "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."<br /> "What sort of trouble?"<br /> "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went way."<br /> "Went away?"<br /> "They disappeared."<br /> "Hmmm. So what does your screen look like now?"<br /> "Nothing."<br /> "Nothing?" "It's a blank; it won' t accept anything when I type."<br /> "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"<br /> "How do I tell?"<br /> "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?"<br /> "What's a sea-prompt?"<br /> "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?"<br /> "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."<br /> "Does your monitor have a power indicator?"<br /> "What's a monitor?"<br /> "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have<br />a<br /> little light that tells you when it's on?"<br /> "I don't know."<br /> "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord<br /> goes into it. Can you see that?"<br /> "Yes, I think so."<br /> "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the<br /> wall." "Yes, it is."<br /> "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two<br />cables<br /> plugged into the back of it, not just one?"<br /> "No." "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the<br />other cable."<br /> "Okay, here it is."<br /> "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of<br /> your computer." "I can't reach."<br /> "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"<br /> "No."<br /> "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"<br /> "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle it's because it's<br />dark."<br /> "Dark?"<br /> "Yes, the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in<br />from<br /> the window."<br /> "Well, turn on the office light then."<br /> "I can't."<br /> "No? Why not?"<br /> "Because there's a power failure."<br /> "A power... a power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now. "Do you<br />still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?"<br /> "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."<br /> Then take it back to the store you bought it from."<br /> "Really? Is it that bad?" "Yes, I'm afraid it is."<br /> "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"<br /><br /> "Tell them you're too ####ing $tupid to own a computer."<br /> .................................
