How do your choices compare to your Parents?

[Bigprairie1]

Ok....how do your life choices compare to your parents or what do you do better than your generation before you...ie: your Parents or particularly your Dad?
By this I mean....do you live a healthier life? are you more educated? are you as 'handy'? do you excercise more? smoke less? drink less? The backstory on this is that I was out with some friends and we were commenting on the lifestyles of our parents and as a reference, our demographic is the late 40's/early 50's age group.
Basically pretty much all of us feel we have 'upped the game' for the better part on all of the above. Only one guy smokes out of about 10-12. We all get some type of excercise through jogging, cycling, swimming or some type of energetic activity...although no hard core super athlete stuff.
We were laughing that it was unlikely we could ever imagine any of our fathers doing any direct (public) excercise after the age of 50....and they all pretty much smoked for most of their lives. Which is another angle to my direct social group is that we all tend to make substantially better food choices...for the better part and again, we can't ever recall our parents (Fathers?) ever ordering just a salad at a restaurant...LOL. Now, all that said....all of us could easily stand to lose 20 lbs or more....so we definitely aren't out in the ironman/bullet proof group/category.
On the education front most of us are better educated than our parents and make/earn at least the same money they did....probably more. The one thing that was 'on the edge' was to whether or not we had more 'hard skills'....such as building, mechanics, general life/technical knowledge. Some of the group had taken a step back in this area.
On the social lifestyle 'drinking end' of things....we all pretty much drink less than our parents from an alcohol standpoint. We often all get together for some big dinner evenings and although there is some wine and a few beers consumed...it pretty much always ends in late evening coffees with everyone usually long gone at or before 11:00. This again, is (generally) a lot less than the way our parents, for the better part lived.
We could all remember our parents having some pretty big parties with their friends with way more drinking, etc going on....which was not completely unheard back in the 50's, 60's and (early?) 70's with that demographic. Now despite all of the differences of these 2 generational lifestyles in our immediate group....the outcome of most of these (our) parents was still pretty good and many of them are still around and kicking. Most (all?) have given up the smokin' and drinkin' stuff.....given the fact that those who are still around are now into their 80's.

So how do you feel you fare against your parents and their lifestyle?.....do you feel you raised the bar or met theirs?

All Good
BP

 

[rbh]

I wrote about three paragraphs worth of stuff, deleted it when it occurred to me its just the social circle you hang with and what the pack does, rubs off on you.

Not to many people want to be the social pariah (sp) ,( but I do have my own big drum to beat on LOL)

 

[greenbush future]

I do things amazingly similar to how I was raised, but then there are many things I do way way different. Point is it's different times we are in these days and there's no way we could do them the same.

I don't smoke, because I know better. I don't drink much because I know better too. Better educated, no, just smarter on how to make a buck w/o an education. I also don't have a pension, like they all do, but I'm in great financial shape, you have to plan now a days. The times of 30 years and a pension are all but over.

I'm glad I'm not a kid in today's world, these kids will have a much bigger challenge than me. I like simpler times, I also liked my childhood, which today's kids are robbed of.

 

[Bigprairie1]

Yeah I would have to agree with you greenbush on how similar I still am to my Dad in many respects....and everyone seems to say so as well.
I think one of the things about this parent reflection bit was....if you are doing better than your parents on some or most fronts....that was kind of the point I suppose of our parents and parenting and not necessarily any type of judgement comparison or anything like that.
Noting that most parents hope their kids rise to greater levels I suppose.
My dad was a farm kid from Alberta and many kids growing up rurally in Alberta at that time didn't get much of a chance to finish high school. That era would have in the mid-late 40's and education wasn't emphasized as much as working...particularly on a family farm.
My Mom was raised in an era when 'the plan' was to either get married OR if you were going to be hitting the career path....becoming a teacher or a nurse, and that was about it. She went for the marriage but would have been better off going for the career thing I think.
Many other habits and traits of that older generation were simply par for the course at that time in history....ie, smoking...which was an era when just about everyone going into the 50's seemed to smoke, or so it seemed.

I also agree about the lost childhood of kids today vs. even a few years ago....lots of data starting to pop up on the results of that right now. I remember my Mom and Dad pretty much kicking me and my siblings out of the house from about the age of 5 or 6 and on. Usually something was likely to go wrong if we were in the house....not out of it...at least thats certainly the way my parents saw it.....LOL
I remember the first time I was allowed to ride my bike to school on the public streets....I think I was probably about 10 years old.

BP

 

[phillyg]

That's a tough question. I am more educated, I drink much less, never smoked, and have been more successful than my parents. But, sometimes I feel like they had a better life overall because they lived in simpler times and had less outside distractions to deal with. I don't see my kids and grandkids being nearly as successful and am concerned for their well-being in this very complicated era.

 

[angus63]

Most measure success by how much you have to make you happy. I think a better measure of success is how little you need to be happy. My parents and I differ in most categories, but I would say we are equally successful in raising a happy healthy family and enjoying life.

 

[WIMUSKY]

Most measure success by how much you have to make you happy. I think a better measure of success is how little you need to be happy. My parents and I differ in most categories, but I would say we are equally successful in raising a happy healthy family and enjoying life.

Well said, angus..................................

 

[foodfisher]

The apple didn't fall too far from my parents tree. Given the advances in technology and transportation I'd say I'm the spittin image of a meld between the two.

 

[aspeck]

What foodfisher said ... Lifestyle is very similar to my parents (non-smoking, non-drinking) and I ate like my parents till recently. In January I changed my diet and have dropped 70 pounds ... 40 more to my target weight. My political views are very similar. My financial plan is similar. They instilled a love for boating, and although I don't have time to boat, could not image ever being without one. They taught me to not take myself too seriously and value others over myself. Like them, I enjoy helping others, but have kicked it up a notch. They taught me to enjoy life and family, be proud of my country, and to love God. If I can do as good a job with my kids as they did with their 3 sons, I will be a happy man!

 

[inthedirtagain]

My grandfather was of the WWII generation, my dad Vietnam. I should have gone to Iraq, but transferred out of my unit just before they shipped out (good timing?). I think this plays into their psyche with the choices they made and wanting to provide a better childhood than they had as kids. I'm not complaining one bit about my childhood because I know I had it far easier than they did.........and that's all thanks to their efforts. Like others have stated here, I'm no drinker/smoker/gambler like my predecessors, but that doesn't mean I'm not without my vices.

My wife jokes that I was born in the wrong generation and I would have to agree with her. I choose to drive much older vehicles, listen to much older music than my age reflects (I'm 39, my musical tastes start at 1920), and I'm more happy out in nature by myself than I am in town with other people. I've earned my Master's degree in healthcare when my dad only attended college for 2 weeks, my grandfather skipped out on high school and joined the Navy at 16 and lived through the attack of Pearl Harbor (barely). My dad and grandfather have experienced things I couldn't begin to comprehend, but that being said, I've accomplished much more than they were capable of at the time. It shapes who we are, but doesn't define us as better or worse. Different times and attitudes force different outcomes. You just have to play the hand you're dealt.

 

[pikefisherman]

I have been lucky to have been employed so as to be semiretired at 58 my dad worked till 70.But I am glad he taught us that we needed to take care of our own and the lessons on courtesy on the water he taught me are priceless, something others I see on the water were never taught.

 

[dingbat]

My parents are the tale of two people with very different goals in life. Probably why they've been divorced for almost 30 years...lol

Dad isn't materialistic and has little to no ambition to "get ahead". He could live in a cave in the side of a hill and be happy. If you follow the theory that "success is best measured by how little you need to be happy" then he was/is a huge success. I'm willing to beat my mother and his second, now ex-wife would strongly disagree with that measure of success......lol

I had everything I needed growing up, but well below the material standards of my peers. This caused me a lot of embarrassment and put me into a lot awkward situations growing up. The experience kindled an ambition to get ahead that has served me very well as an adult.

Health wise, I'm the party animal of the family, though I stopped smoking at age 30. Neither of my parents ever smoked. Mom doesn't drink at all and Dad for the most part is a social drinker.

My grandparents on both sides lived well into their late 80's, mid- 90's. I don't see any reason why my parents will not follow suit. Pushing 60, I've never been hospitalized, take no medications and my vitals are close to that of my 18 year old daughter. So far, so good.

Skill wise, my grandfather was a millwright his entire life. In my eyes, there was nothing he couldn't do, build or fix. I idolized him for that and followed in his foot steps. I tired to instill the same in my daughters with some success. My oldest (21) will not hesitate to tear into something to see if it can be fixed. The youngest (18) has a little different attitude..."that's what husbands are for"......

 

[agallant80]

Interesting question. Never really thought of it.

Dad 64 me 34
Exercise: Me yes, Dad, no
Vices: Both stopped smoking around same age, both drink about the same amount though I think my father partied harder than I did and i'm sure he did more drugs
Money: My father takes this one, I save but am not nearly the tight *** he is/was.
Happiness: I think I take this one. My father always has/had a reason to defer his happiness.
Relationship: My dad takes the cake here in terms of time. He has been married 43 years. I am on my 2nd wife. With that said I think I am much more happy in my relationship than he is/was.
Education: Kinda a tie here. Both have HS as our highest level though I am much more successful but I think that is more so to do with risk tolerance.
Handy Skills: About a tie. My father would have more attention to detail than me.
Heath: My dad, he has good genetics. I eat too much crap.
Complexity: My father has done a good job keeping his life simple. I on the other hand always have 10 things I am trying to juggle.

 

[four winns 214]

I am the classic baby boomer. My dad grew up in the Depression, graduated high school in 1943 and battled the Japanese with a BAR (Browning Automatic Rifle) on Okinawa in May 1945 as a replacement in the 96th Infantry Division. After the war, he came home and two years later married his girlfriend (my mother) and helped create the baby boom. I was born in 1957, the demographic peak of the boom.

After surviving Okinawa (the 96th took horrible casualties- there was a reason replacements were needed!), my dad was garrisoned in the Philippines until he had enough points to be shipped back to the states. While in the Philippines, ever the wheeler-dealer, he somehow got possession of a boat and procured a Chrysler marine engine from the Navy. He got it all working and enjoyed some boating until it was wrecked by a typhoon.

I know all of this because I have about 100 letters that my dad wrote to my mother from that time. They are treasured possessions. In the letters, he mentions ads for Chris Craft boats that my mother would send him. The ads detailed boats Chris Craft planned to build post-war. He and my mother used to boat on Deep Creek Lake in western Maryland with his best friend, a doctor's son who access to a boat.

My dad loved boats, but never had one. All his time and money went into starting and growing a business and raising a family. He started with nothing. Just when his business was really starting to roll, in 1967 he and my mother were both killed in a car accident.

Thanks to my father's brother and his wife (definitely part of the Greatest Generation) who took my two older sisters and me, I had a good home life afterwards and went to college.

OK, so here's how I'm different than my parents. Different time. Different life experiences.

Smoke: He did. I don't.
Drink: I probably less.
Education: Him high school, me college, but there's no question who was smarter.

Probably the biggest difference is attitude toward money. He was all about making money work. I make it and spend it. Don't think I that I don't save, I do. But I spend my money. I have spent what he probably would have considered an unconscionable amount of money on boats. He would have put that money into real estate. One of the great laments of my life is that I never got the opportunity to take my dad boating. Whenever I get my cruiser boat, I have the name already picked out: "Casper's Cruiser"